


1001 Ways

by elvirakitties



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bad Dumbledore, Fluff and Humor, Good Severus Snape, Lots and Lots of Deaths., Master of Death Harry Potter, Out of Character, Slash, Tom Riddle is Not Voldemort, Wizard of Oz References
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-15
Updated: 2018-11-30
Packaged: 2019-01-17 12:03:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 19
Words: 30,862
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12365367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elvirakitties/pseuds/elvirakitties
Summary: Dokidokibaka:Dumbledore, how do I want to kill you? Let me count the ways...I took it as a challenge.





	1. Chapter 1

Harry was strumming his fingers on his desk. He was looking down at the list of recently deceased. He was also bored. "Master?"

"Death." Harry missed people. He didn't count being around dead people. They didn't count in his book.

"You know you could play with him." Death sat down. He selected today, at least, to look like an old man with a black business suit. He looked like he was a funeral director.

"I could. It's not like we can fix anything after." Harry had learned a lot of interesting information after Dumbledore's death and he became a legal adult. He smirked. "You have an idea of which timeline?"

"There are a few that you never survived. I say have fun. Let's have a game. Just try to keep the death toll down during our peak times." 

"Rules?" 

"Bonus points if no one thinks he died from anything but an accident. You lose points if you actually kill him out of annoyance."

"Interesting. What stakes?" 

"I win, I get a holiday in whatever timeline. You win, you get a holiday with me distracting the sisters."

Harry thought about it. Fate, Destiny, and Lady Magic would have a fit once they found out but that wasn't anything new. The three sisters never agreed on anything unless they were lecturing him and Death. "Deal." 

"Let the games begin." 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------

Harry frowned. "Really, Death? I'm what, 14?"

"No, you are 10. It gives you eight years to kill him as many times as you can. Also, work on killing anyone else who needs it."

"It's before the zoo?" Harry looked around the sitting room. He wondered where his relatives were.

"Yes, it happened in June. This is October." Death saw a small grin appear on his Master's face. His Master was going to torment his relatives. "No Horcruxes, no Dark Lord wraith. In this world, you died shortly after Dumbledore placed you here. Mrs. Figg has been dealt with already. As far as anyone is concerned you have been living here for the last 9 years." Death was going to enjoy watching his Master have some fun. It had been too long.

"If I kill Dumbledore he will just respawn with a quick reset. Everyone will be unaware of what happened?" 

"Yes. It will be like the total event hadn't occurred."

___________________________________________________________________________

"What is that infernal racket?" Severus Snape demanded. The Heads of Houses were meeting in the Headmaster's office to discuss the upcoming Halloween Feast. When things started whistling and screeching.

"Harry!" Dumbledore jumped out of his seat, giving orders as walked. "He's in danger. Severus, Minerva with me. Filius warn Poppy we might need her assistance." Without waiting to see if his instructions were being followed Dumbledore was already out of his office.

_______________________________________________________________

Harry watched from the park as the Dursley's house was burning to the ground. The fire department was delayed in receiving the call and he had made sure he was seen at the local market. He cast an enhanced eye spell that he earned long ago in Egypt to watch for when Dumbledore would arrive. 

Harry heard the sounds of three apparitions. He smirked as he saw Dumbledore's colorful robes. He waited for Dumbledore, with Severus and Minerva, to reach his relatives' house. Minerva and Severus were dressed like muggles. The police stopped them from getting close but Harry had been saving this idea. He waved his hand and sent his relatives house up into the air, swirling around and as everyone ran, the house crashed down on top of Dumbledore. 

"You have watched too much Wizard of Oz, Master." 

"Maybe, but it counts as one."


	2. Chapter 2

Harry stared at the three of them. They were currently sitting in a room at the Leaky Cauldron. The neighbors and fireman had informed Dumbledore, Minerva, and Severus about the abuse they had seen. The neighbors added their own opinion as the firemen showed Dumbledore evidence of where Harry had been sleeping. Harry realized that Death had established his former life into this new life. Well, it was workable. 

"Who put me there?" Harry had listened to them express their condolences about his relatives.

"I thought it would be for the best." Dumbledore held out a candy. "Lemon drop?" 

Harry glared. He just got offered a lemon drop? What drug was the man on? "You put me there and never checked on me?" 

"I had someone watching over you. Mrs. Figg, your babysitter." 

"Mrs. Figg died over six years ago." Harry resisted the urge to roll his eyes but gave into watching Dumbledore's beard has it began to snake it's away around Dumbledore's neck. 

Severus arched a brow. "Who has been training you? Instructing you about magic?"

"No one. I would have thought my shocked look when you brought me gave that away." Harry wasn't going to even pretend to be the old Harry Potter. The one Dumbledore had raised as a weapon. He was going to ask all the questions he never got answers to before. He had been a bit shocked because no one gave him a warning. They just grabbed him and one port-key later they were in Diagon Alley.

"Attitude, Mr. Potter." Minerva reprimanded. Her lips were pressed together but Harry thought she looked angrier at Dumbledore than him.

"Stuff my attitude. My abusive relatives are dead. I discover this clown is the one who left me with them, never checked on me, never wondered why his watcher never sent him even a letter. Only to discover you three use magic. To top it all off, this clown offers me a lemon drop as if this was an everyday occurrence."

"It was for your protection after your parents were killed-"

"What do you mean killed? They died in a drunken car crash that my lush of a pimp father caused while he was delivering my prostitute mother to her next job." 

"They did not. Your parents were brave-" Minerva wasn't happy with what she was hearing.

"Your father was a bully."

"Severus! That wasn't necessary." Dumbledore held up his hand. "Your parents died protecting you."

"Murdered. Your godfather betrayed them." Severus helpfully added.

Harry slammed his shields down. He loved Severus for causing Dumbledore to get so close to losing it.

"Great. What else haven't I been told." 

Severus leaned back in his chair. "You're a wizard."

Harry slowly turned and looked at him. "You are taking way to much enjoyment out of dropping these little bombshells, aren't you?"

"Life offers so little enjoyment." Severus calmly replied. 

Harry huffed. "Tell me about it." As he said it his stomach reminded him rather loudly that he was hungry. He had forgotten that aspect of being among the living again.

"Severus, Minerva, why don't you fetch us some dinner. I will explain to Harry about his parents." 

As soon as they left Harry waved his hand discretely and Dumbledore's beard started choking him. He stuffed a lemon drop down the man's throat and waited. Death finally appeared. "I always wanted him to choke on one of them."

"You weren't the only one." Death looked at the corpse. "Why do I have a feeling his beard and lemon drops are going to be making a lot of appearances?"

"Popular request?" Harry shrugged. 

"Well, let me fix this. Oh, he sent a message to Molly Weasley. He told her you would be living there." Death cleaned up the room, reset time, and made sure no reaper was in the area. 

"Not if I have anything to say about it." Harry really hated Dumbledore and his controlling ways. 

"Have fun, Master." Death popped away.

"-parents loved you and it was your mother's protection that saved you while you lived at your aunt's." 

Severus and Minerva had returned at the last part. "So much love, they left behind the scars." Harry spit out. He was going to kill the man again, tonight, within the hour if the man didn't shut up. He honestly wondered why his eyes weren't brown.

"You will remain here tonight. Tomorrow, I will bring you to your new family. The Weasleys will be happy to have you in their home." Dumbledore smiled as Severus put the food down on the table.

"I'm not going anywhere you suggest." Harry walked to the table. 

"Mr. Potter the Headmaster only wants the best for you."

Harry laughed. "If putting me at abusive relatives, leaving me unaware of magic, and everything else I have learned tonight is his best, I honestly don't want to see his worst. I won't be going to this Weasley house." 

"I'm afraid you don't have a choice. I'm your magical guardian." 

Severus froze as he watched Harry's face. Harry saw the man still as Harry narrowed his eyes. "I do have a choice. I won't be going." 

Minerva and Severus knew that look well. It was a look that Dumbledore didn't acknowledge and usually overrode but they knew Harry Potter wasn't about to be ignored. "I will pick you up in the morning."

Harry rose from his seat. "Good night." Harry exited the room, sealing the door as he left. He knew Dumbledore would write it off as accidental magic. He headed straight to Gringotts. As an afterthought, he added some poison to Dumbledore's food. "That won't count, Master." Death mentally told him. 

"I'm aware. Just make sure it's handled." 

"I will."

"Shame we can't just stick him in the ground now." A reaper apprentice was heard. Harry realized that Death must be getting ready for the sorting of the newly departed souls. 

"You have time." Death informed Harry.

Harry heard the thud of a corpse. Minerva screaming "do something, Severus."


	3. Chapter 3

"So, it will take a few days for you to research everything and bring Madam Bones into it?" Harry held back his anger. Harry had never realized how long or how well paid Molly Weasley was. He saw a payment schedule was set up for Ron, Hermione, and Ginny. He already handled all of it. Harry closed his old vaults and moving them to the higher security ones. He gave the goblins a feral grin that made them glad he wasn't going to kill them as he added parseltongue blood wards to his vaults. He hoped Dumbledore tried to enter his new vaults. 

The goblins were quite happy and willing to work with the Master of Death, once they realized Harry wasn't there to kill them. They knew who Harry was as soon as they entered the bank. Many of the goblins were still hiding in case the Master of Death was going to take his anger out on them because of Dumbledore. "Yes, where will you be?" 

"Making certain Weasleys wish they had never been born." 

_________________________________________________________________________

Severus arrived with Dumbledore at the Leaky Cauldron. Harry was already down in the pub, eating his breakfast. "My boy-"

"I'm not your boy." Harry growled. He didn't even look up from the paper. 

"Harry, are your things ready?" Dumbledore was going to ignore the comment and get Harry to the Weasleys.

"What thing? Did you forget what little I owned was destroyed in the fire?" Harry raised his head and glared at Dumbledore. "Did you think I carried around my one blanket and two broken toys with me when my aunt forced me to work as a house elf? You should be grateful I wasn't still locked in my room. You know the cupboard under the stairs." Harry saw Severus' hid his smirk.

"Yes, yes, I believe a shopping trip is in order. I have your key here." Dumbledore pulled out a small gold key.

________________________________________________________________

"That will be 132 Galleons, 3 Sickles, and 8 Knuts." The sales girl had spent an hour gathering clothes that would fit Harry. She had measured, she had adjusted the items, she had charmed all the clothes. 

Dumbledore handed over Harry's key. Severus had supported Harry's choice in clothes so Dumbledore was a bit disappointed that nothing he selected made it into the purchase pile. Harry had added mostly blacks and a variety of muggle clothes. "I'm sorry, Sir, but the key has been declined."

"What? Are you sure?" Dumbledore knew he had the right key. He made sure of it before he left Hogwarts. It was the key he used to pay for everything.

"Yes, Sir." The girl pointed to the pile of gold flakes that now littered the counter.

"Great, the great Headmaster of Hogwarts is broke." Harry knew Rita had to be around here somewhere.

"I'm sure it's a slight misunderstanding. That key belonged to the Potter Trust Vault." 

"What? I have a trust vault. Why didn't you tell me? Don't you think you should have asked me before using my key?" Harry demanded. Harry could see others around him were wondering what was going on. Severus, he could see, was now sitting in one of the waiting area chairs, smirking. He was going to have to speak to the man and soon.

"It's all a slight misunderstanding." Dumbledore reached into his robe, pulled out his own key. He hated to pay for things with his own money but he would remove the funds from the Potter Vault later. He handed over the key.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Severus and Harry were following the old coot. Harry could see Ron and Ginny were watching the twins playing against Bill and Charlie in a game of Quidditch. Harry wondered how they weren't at Hogwarts. "Honestly, isn't that a stereotype they wouldn't want?" 

"Not a fan?" 

"Of flying around with a piece of wood between my legs? If I see a magic carpet, I'm outta of here."

As Dumbledore neared the garden, Harry smirked. Dumbledore saw the gnomes raising from their burrows but kept walking. Soon the gnomes were edging closer and closer until they attacked. Biting and clawing at Dumbledore. No one but Harry seemed to notice.

"Mr. Potter perhaps it's just me but death by gnome will make people look at you." 

Harry jumped a bit as he wasn't expecting Severus to be a witness. Dumbledore's screams finally died out. "DEATH!"

"Master, I must say, death by gnome is something I wasn't expecting." 

"Neither was I." Severus looked at Death. He knew this was going to be interesting. 

"What is going on?" The Reapers were already handling the gnomes. "Don't move them too far away, I have a few uses for them." Harry informed the reapers.

"Just putting them back in their burrows, Sir." One of the Senior Reapers pulled a gnome off of Dumbledore's leg.

"Perhaps a bit of an explanation is in order. I know Dumbledore was just murdered by some gnomes and yet it looks like it is going to be covered up."

Harry always loved how Severus never overreacted to anything. The man always seemed to have total control over his emotions, even when he was "yelling" at students. "Death meet Severus Snape, Potion Master at Hogwarts, Severus Snape meet Death, I don't think he needs more of an introduction." 

"Indeed." 

"We have a bet going." Harry knew Dumbledore was going to be attacked again by the gnomes unless he used the floo in the Weasley house to go back to Hogwarts.

"Perhaps I should explain." Death, without waiting for confirmation, provided Severus with the memories of Harry's timeline and what Dumbledore did. Severus fell to the ground.

"You could have given him some warning." Harry summoned a headache potion. "He's not used to working with living mortals." Harry waited for Severus to recover. "Interested in the Death Bet?"

"I do believe Mr. Potter that I am." Severus was relieved. No more Dark Lord. No need to worry about him returning. He was going to enjoy making Dumbledore pay for thinking the old Dark Lord was going to return and the torment his other self had endured. 

"Did he explain about the Weasleys?" 

"Yes. I do believe Mr. Potter, we shall be having some fun. What is your plan for, I am sure, will be a short stay?"

Harry didn't respond as Dumbledore was back to life and time resumed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No gnomes were hurt in the making of this chapter


	4. Chapter 4

Harry refused to eat anything Molly Weasley put on the table. "I will not remain here."

"Now, my boy, it's for the best." 

"I'm not your boy. I am not going to trust anyone you place me with. You are responsible for what my relatives did to me. You are responsible for me not even knowing I am a wizard." 

"Albus, what does the boy mean?" Arthur Weasley could see Harry didn't want to be here and he was going to make life very difficult for Albus Dumbledore. 

"It's nothing."

Dumbledore dismissed his concerns, again. Oh, the man was going to pay. "NOTHING. They beat me, they starved me, they kept me locked in a cupboard and you call it nothing!" 

Severus covered his mouth. Arthur and Molly appeared shocked. He knew Molly wasn't what she appeared to be and was too far into Dumbledore's pockets. "Well, now you can live here. We have six boys, and Ginny, our darling daughter is our youngest."

"Nope, not staying." Harry looked out the window and as Dumbledore and Molly took a sip of their tea.

Severus snorted as he looked at the two chickens clucking around the table. Arthur started screaming at the twins. Harry winked at Severus as Arthur was now standing at the door yelling at the twin to fix their prank. 

____________________________________________________________________________ 

While everyone was trying to gain control over the chaos he caused Harry slipped a note to Severus. Harry asked Severus to inform Gringotts where he was. Harry returned to his watching as the twins were trying to defend themselves but they really weren't sure if it was one of their delayed pranks or if their mother accidentally added one of their experimental potions into the tea.

"Perhaps Professor Snape can look through the potions?" Charlie finally spoke causing all of the Weasleys to look at him. 

"I can do that." 

Harry had to cover his smirk. He had avoided Ginny so far, the girl was still in her staring at him stage which didn't go away until after her first year. He wasn't going to have her following him around or being a groupie. Ron, well, he wasn't going to allow that idiot to ever be seen as one of his friends. Harry watched Severus perform a variety of spells to test the pranks. When Severus announced he knew the cure, Harry waited until Severus finished the cure and released the prank. "I need to learn that skill, Severus. What is it called?"

"It's called potions and it's Professor Snape." Severus wasn't going to give the impression of allowing anyone familiarity.

"So I'm taking it Uncle Sevvie is out?" Harry laughed as Dumbledore and Molly were now getting some fresh tea. 

"Infernal brat." 

"Now that everything is settled, Severus, I do believe it's time for us to leave." Dumbledore rose. 

Harry saw Dumbledore's eyes grow huge. Severus had his sleeves rose up, exposing his bare forearms. Severus had rolled them up when he was reviewing the twins potions. Oh, Harry was going to have fun. "One for the road?"

"Yes, I think so." Severus laughed as Dumbledore was suddenly turned into a teacup and smashed against the wall, little bits of china was ground into the floor as dancing gnomes did the Irish Jig on Dumbledore.


	5. Chapter 5

Harry waited until everyone was out of the Burrow to pull his newest way to get even. Ginny was down the road at Luna's while the boys were flying. Arthur was at work and Molly was off running errands. Dumbledore was the reason why the everyone was at the Burrow so that they could welcome their "new brother". He stood in the center of the kitchen he looked at Death. "Do it." 

Death cast the Fidelius Charm with Harry being the Secret Keeper. "They can't keep me here if they can't find it." Harry pulled two chairs to the front of the opened door. Death and Harry had a cup of tea while they watched the confusion out of the kitchen doorway. Harry was sitting on the chair to the left while Death was seated on the right one. The door was opened giving them a view of the front yard where the boys were still flying. They also knew it would enable them to see when Molly and Ginny arrived. "Glad we covered the shed too or Dumbledore would have had us sleeping in there." Harry was still wondering why all the Weasley boys were really home instead of at Hogwarts as welcoming their "new brother" wasn't a valid reason for removing students and it had never been allowed before. 

"He will think you cast the spell and with no Secret Keeper he will have to hire Gringotts to break it." Death was going to make sure Dumbledore couldn't break it. Dumbledore liked to think he was all-knowing and wise. However, the man was narcissist of the highest ranking. Dumbledore just managed to hide it better than most. 

"I paid Gringotts to delay breaking it already." Harry waved his hand and Weasley garden withered. The grass died, the trees started to decay. They saw Molly turn off the lane and stop. They watched Molly look around trying to figure out what was missing. The boys landed as Molly started screaming at them about their missing home. She thought it was the right spot. They saw her order Bill to go to the Lovegoods and summon Arthur and Dumbledore. "Showtime. We need popcorn for next time." A reaper quietly spoke from the gathered reapers behind them. 

"Hot buttered popcorn." Harry suggested. "Maybe some with caramel." Death took the hint and one of the reapers went off to gather popcorn from home.

Dumbledore, with Severus and Arthur Weasley, appeared about ten minutes later. Dumbledore was verifying fact with Molly and Arthur on their missing residence. Dumbledore kept asking if they were sure they had the correct area for their home. "Perhaps we should see if Mr. Potter knows what happened?" Severus knew Harry and Death must have used a Fidelius Charm. 

"Oh, dear. I forgot about Harry." Molly started screaming. "Harry, Harry, where are you?"

Harry sighed. "Time to go to work." He got up, passed his bag of microwaved popcorn to the closest reaper. He headed out of the house. "What? What do you and the what not to wear want?" 

"Really that isn't the way to speak about the Headmaster." Molly looked like she was wanted to do more than reprimand Harry. 

Harry saw that Molly was about to continue on her rant but Arthur stopped her. "Harry, we were worried. The house is missing."

"No, it's not. It's right there." Harry pointed to where the shed was. He saw Death slip the location into Severus' hand as Harry had written out the addressed and spelled it so only Severus would be able to read it. Severus was reading the address as Harry spoke.

"I see. Perhaps if you could tell us what spell you used we could break it." Dumbledore suggested.

"I didn't. I was watching them fly until Mrs. Suzie Homemaker arrived and started screaming about things." 

The twins, with Bill and Charlie, were trying not to laugh. Arthur looked tired. He knew Molly was difficult at the best of times but now with Harry being forced here, it was worse. She seemed determined to get the boy into some mold Dumbledore wanted. Harry was equally determined not to remain in their home. Last night proved that. Molly had kept trying to push Ginny on Harry. Harry had been polite at first. The trouble started after the fifth time Molly tried to force the pair together. Harry locked himself in his room that he was to be sharing with Ronald. Harry wouldn't leave until Arthur promised Ginny would remain at least ten feet away from him. "So you didn't use any magic." 

"Nope. I didn't cast a single spell." Harry loved loopholes. He didn't cast anything, Death did. He could see Severus, while his face didn't change from his normal stern look, was enjoying this. He was even wearing a t-shirt. "Nice look, Sevvie. I like the t-shirt." It was a t-shirt that Harry thought fit. It read "what doesn't kill you, disappoints me." 

"I thought it fit." Severus watched Death and the reapers suddenly change their looks to match his t-shirt. Severus had been enjoying showing off his bare arm. Granted, it had been bare for ten years. Since he learned about Dumbledore planned he set out in his own way to create problems. He was professional when he taught but he wasn't going to be covering his bare arms unless he had to.

"I think it will be our new motto." Death and the reapers were now dressed in black muggle jeans, with black t-shirts.

Dumbledore looked like he was going to have a fit. He also didn't see the gnomes coming out of their holes. "I believe Harry had a case of accidental magic. Since he has no desire to be here, I believe, he caused your home to disappear." Harry waved the gnomes away. He didn't want them to get sick from eating too much Dumbledore.

"I told you I didn't want to remain here." Harry looked at the broomsticks. The brooms suddenly came alive and started swatting at Dumbledore, Molly, Ginny, and Ron causing the four of them to start running. Arthur, with Bill and Charlie, tried to stun the brooms. The Twins were laughing, Percy was giving them a lecture about pranks.

When Arthur, Bill, and Charlie finally got the brooms stunned Severus looked at the panting and wheezing Dumbledore. "Perhaps it would be best until we recover the Weasley home that Mr. Potter resides at Hogwarts. The Weasley family, I believe, have someplace else they can reside until Gringotts breaks whatever was done?"

"Mr. Potter will be able to join the Weasley family." Dumbledore wanted the boy under his control and Molly would be able to control him, after all, she controlled her own brood. He needed the boy to lose this attitude he had. He needed Harry to follow the role he crafted and created.

"Albus, my aunt will barely put us up, nevermind Harry." Arthur knew his aunt would have no choice but to put them up but she would not allow strangers into her home.

"My Aunt might but she is just as bad as Arthur's. She doesn't even like us to visit her unless it's for a set time frame." Molly's Aunt Muriel was famous for kicking people out if they stayed a second longer than they stated they would remain. "She kicked Ginny out last week when Ginny tried to stay longer for tea." 

Harry's grin turned gleeful. "Oh, I want to meet them." He knew he would get along with both women. Anyone who didn't like Molly and Ginny had to be good people in his book.

Dumbledore didn't like that tone. "I see. How about everyone come to Hogwarts. Harry can gather your items from the house and we can go to Hogwarts."

"Sorry, not anyone's slave any longer. I'm not gathering anything for anyone." Harry folded his arms over his chest. The Weasley children stepped back. The adults may not recognize that Harry wasn't going to be a pushover but they did. After all, they each had six siblings to learn when you could push someone and when you really shouldn't. Harry was in the really shouldn't mode. 

"My dear boy-"

"I'm not your dear boy." Harry snapped and a tree branch came down and whacked Dumbledore across the dead grass and impaled him on a fence post. 

"That doesn't count." Death froze everyone has the reapers kept gnomes from going after Dumbledore. At Harry's look. "They think he tasted good. I believe something about lemons." 

"He is lucky I didn't drop a house on him again." 

"You won't win the bet if you keep losing your temper." Severus watched the reaper work. "Union?"

"Yes." Death huffed.

"Local 1 at your service." The reapers all cheerfully informed Severus. 

"Union for each continent." Harry explained. "Though surprisingly the Arctic gets a lot of business."

"Yeah, from you." Death looked at Severus. "He has killed Dumbledore a lot when the man shows up after he dies in another timeline. He drops him off there or gives him to some polar bears."

"They get hungry." Harry just shrugged. He honestly didn't care how many times he killed Dumbledore. It was one of the perks of the job as far as he was concerned.

"Reset ready." The Reapers announced. 

"-I'm sure it won't be that hard to gather their things for a few days." 

"No." 

"Harry Potter, your parents would be so ashamed of you!" Molly snapped. "You ought-" Molly's mouth disappeared.

"How would they feel about you? Keeping a child prisoner? How would they feel knowing he was left to be ABUSED!" 

"Severus, why don't you take Harry back to Hogwarts. Arthur, take Molly to St. Mungos. I will see about getting the goblins here." 

Arthur sighed. He knew this wasn't going to get better if Dumbledore and his wife kept insisting Harry remain here. "Fine. However, Harry won't be returning. It's not because of anything he has done. It is because of what you and Molly have done. He doesn't want to be here and I don't blame him." He held up his hand as Molly started waving her arms around. "Molly, no. What you just said is a great example of why. Bill take everyone to Aunt Beatrice's. Inform her what is going on. I will escort your mother to St. Mungos."

Harry was already standing by Severus when Arthur finished stating what was going to happen. Soon all the Weasley's were gone and it was just Dumbledore. "Playtime." Harry grinned. 

Dumbledore was suddenly staked on the ground with fire ants all over him. "Betting pool on time of death?" 

"That isn't fair, Master, we know you can delay it." Death added some honey onto Dumbledore as Severus conjured a gag.

"I won't enter." Soon bets were being placed.


	6. Chapter 6

Harry was almost bouncing as he walked next to Severus. "He won't stop."

"I'm counting on it." 

"The Order?" Severus found that he had enjoyed watching Harry Potter, of all people, tormenting Dumbledore. He wasn't sure why Death had included him in their bet but he was enjoying it. He knew he should be horrified but after those memories of the variety of different timelines. He had been shocked at what Dumbledore was willing to allow Harry, the Dark Lord, and him to endure, he liked the idea of neverending deaths for Dumbledore. 

Learning the truth about Molly was a surprise. He always thought of her has so wholesome, so caring, so loving, but to learn money was involved and that she knew about Harry's abuse was disturbing. While he didn't care for the woman before this new information he was now was thinking of ways he wanted to see her pay. The youngest two Weasleys and Miss Granger was an interesting facet. He knew Dumbledore would do anything to win a war but to corrupt three students. He realized the youngest two Weasleys had to be have been influenced by Molly and Dumbledore but Miss Granger? The memories of her surprised him. Yes, she was book smart but the fact that she ignored Harry's abuse bothered him. Especially since she wanted to free the house-elves. It just seemed strange to him that she would care about house elves but leave Harry to be abused. Dumbledore and Ron Weasley used the girl's lack of friends to gain her alliance. 

Severus understood how much of a Slytherin Dumbledore really was. All those plans that Dumbledore never shared. Severus believed in Dumbledore but to learn that Dumbledore kept his plans quiet wasn't because he wanted to keep spies from learning the truth but to keep the Order from learning the truth. It was to keep people like Minerva and Arthur loyal to him. It was to keep people for realizing Dumbledore was just as dark as the Dark Lord in some ways. If Minerva ever knew the truth she would have killed Dumbledore. He knew Minerva must have had her memories altered by Dumbledore and more than one time.

"Will be learning the truth but at my own time. In the meantime, we have fun with Dumbledore, Molly, and Lupin. We will get the other three later." Harry finally answered. "I hope he isn't going to try and stick me in the Gryffindor dorm."

"Since you aren't a student, he can't. I would expect him to try. He might even insist on the guest quarters next to the dorm if he can't get you to go into Gryffindor dorm. However, without someone as your guardian, he could have legal issues if he does. I believe many parents would wonder why you were there. As you are not eleven yet, he can't act as if you were a student. So he won't try to force classes on you as of yet." 

"Hopefully I won't remain here for much longer."

"He is still Chief Warlock. He will use that position to keep you under his control. Ironclaw believes that the moron Fudge will follow Dumbledore's advice. Madam Bones will have no choice but to allow Dumbledore to retain custody." Harry smirked. Severus looked at Harry. "You have an idea on how to make sure he doesn't retain custody." 

"Yes. One I believe you will find interesting. Is the Lucius of this timeline such an arse?"

"No. He actually was relieved when our marks disappeared. His father forced him to join." 

"Perhaps Lord Malfoy might like a new ward?" Harry knew that would give Dumbledore a heart attack. 

__________________________________________________________________

Harry was sitting next to Severus for lunch when Dumbledore made his appearance. "Problems, Albus?" Minerva was finishing up her tea.

"A small one. The Weasley home is still missing. The goblins are working on the solution." Dumbledore took his normal throne, well he tried. It disappeared and in its place was a toilet that proceeded to bit him on the arse.

"Interesting." Severus hid his smile as Minerva and Pomona were trying to help Dumbledore off of the biting toilet while the students were laughing. 

"Septic bites on the arse would make an interesting cause of death." Harry quietly suggested to Severus. Suddenly everyone was frozen but Dumbledore who had started to run as the toilet sprouted legs, biting him as he ran.

Severus started laughing at Dumbledore. Dumbledore had his robes up around his knees and couldn't pull out his wand. He kept trying but he would get a bite every time he stopped to try. "Heart attack or eaten by a toilet?" Death appeared behind Harry and Severus. 

"Toilet." Harry pulled out a Galleon.

"Heart attack. The man never gets any exercise." Severus added his Galleon to the growing pile as the reapers picked their sides. 

"If he makes it to the three-minute mark, death by heart attack will win." Death announced. 

One of the reapers produced an hourglass. "Starting now." Harry waved his hand and the toilet grew bigger fangs. The reapers started adding different aspects of the bets to the table from what shade Dumbledore's face was going to turn next to how high the man's robes would rise. Just a side note, no one wanted to take that bet. 

The toilet suddenly jumped into the air, at the 2.5-minute mark, swallowing Dumbledore. "Death by a toilet. Not even a golden one, just a plain old white one." Harry collected his winnings.

________________________________________________________________________

"Ah, my boy-"

"Not your boy, cease calling me that." Harry snapped as they were sitting in Dumbledore's office. Minerva and Severus were seated on each side of him. 

"-you will be staying in Gryffindor-"

"Like hell, I will." Harry cut the man off. 

"Mr. Potter, language." Minerva rebuked him.

"I'm going to make it simple. I'm not a student, I'm not staying in any dorm, house, or whatever term you select to use."

"You need to stay someplace. Granted the dorms are not ideal for someone your age. You need an adult to supervision to make sure you're being taken care of." Minerva wasn't sure what a ten-year-old would due during the day if he remained in the dorms. 

"Glad you agree. I do need a responsible adult. Certainly not that idiot." Harry pointed to Dumbledore "He is going to get me killed one day. I mean look at my history with him so far. So, Sevvie, may I stay with you?" Harry watched Dumbledore's face pale, while Minerva looked surprised.

"My boy-" Dumbledore started coughing. 

"Albus?" Minerva summoned a glass of water.

Dumbledore kept coughing, his face getting redder. "Death by lemon drop?" Severus quietly asked.

"Yes. I can't stand the things." Harry and Severus watched as the man kept coughing. 

"Sorry, Master. I don't have much time, Fate, Time, and Destiny are having a fit. Can you kill him later?" Death appeared next to Dumbledore.

"Sure, tell them I said hi. I have the secret stash of chocolate behind my cloaks in the wardrobe. Time likes the hazelnut, Fate prefers the dark chocolate but if she is in a mood go with the truffles, Destiny is straight up milk chocolate with nuts."

"On it." Death disappeared as Dumbledore started to recover. Minerva was standing in front of him. The lemon flew out of his mouth and it stuck to Minerva's tartan colored robe.

Minerva fussed over Dumbledore for several minutes before they returned to the issue at hand. "Harry, I don't believe staying with Severus is the best idea." Dumbledore wasn't about to allow the two of them to become friends.

"Well, I'm not staying with you. I'm not about to stay with her." Harry pointed to Minerva. "She follows your orders and I'm not staying in any dorm. I guess I can always go to Gringotts and find out what property my parents left me. I'm sure since I have a trust vault that they must have had property." 

Severus was enjoying this Potter. He would never admit it to anyone, willingly, but he actually liked how Harry Potter was boxing the old man in. "They do. I'm sure the house elves would be willing to make sure you are taken care of until you return here in September. It's only ten months." 

"House elves?" Harry could see Dumbledore didn't like the idea of Harry learning how much money or property his parents had. Dumbledore didn't want him to gain any knowledge without his approval.

"Yes, they are magically bound servants. I'm sure your family had a few. I remember your father bragging about them." 

"Great. I will head to Gringotts. Thanks." Harry rose and started to head to the door. 

"My boy-"

"Harry-"

"I'm not your boy, you old coot. It's your fault I'm in this crises." Harry snapped at him. 

"Perhaps Severus would be the best opinion, Albus. He would be here and under adult supervision." Minerva held up her hand when Dumbledore went to respond. "Harry is correct. This is your fault and if he doesn't trust you but at least he is willing to trust Severus." The warning was heard in her tone.

"What makes you think I want the brat? He is a Potter!" Severus knew Dumbledore would love his Potter rant and he knew Dumbledore would be expecting it. "Have you forgotten how I feel about Potter?"

"So not feeling the love, Sevvie." Harry leaned against the table that was holding a huge candy dish. They watched as Dumbledore was trying to think of a solution that didn't involve Harry leaving Hogwarts. "I'm sure the people I meet on the way to Gringotts would love to hear about my time with my relatives. How I came to arrive here. How I-"

"Harry, I will agree to allow you to stay with Severus-"

"How about asking me first!" Severus wanted to laugh. Dumbledore was not expecting a blackmailing, Slytherin Harry Potter and needed time to come up with a better plan. He had a feeling it would involve the appearance of Molly Weasley with her two youngest. He thought for a few minutes. Why were her kids not at Hogwarts? Did Dumbledore arrange for them to be home to meet Harry? Severus looked at Harry, who had a raised eyebrow as if knowing what he was thinking. Severus should have realized what Dumbledore did. He pulled the Weasleys out of Hogwarts for them to make Harry feel welcomed into the family.

"Sevvie, don't you want my charming company?" Harry hid his smirk. "I'm sure if the Weasley twins are back I can stay with them until Dumbarse there finds me a new place to stay. They mentioned some interesting ideas-"

"Mr. Potter show some respect for the Headmaster. He is your elder." Minerva's face was stern.

"Respect is earned, not given. He lost my respect when he put me with my ABUSIVE RELATIVES!" Harry saw all the portraits were now paying full attention instead of pretending to be asleep. "He never checked on me. He never did anything but allow the abuse to happen. I find I'm not in a forgiving mood." 

"Severus, perhaps it would be best if you escort Harry to your quarters." Dumbledore knew a losing battle when he saw one. 

"Mr. Potter, I do believe we will be discussing your language and manners." Severus knew Dumbledore was going to try to regain some influence with Harry and would expect Severus to follow his lead. He also saw the chessboard and knew whatever plans Dumbledore had were now scrapped. As they were heading to his quarters Severus noticed Harry was looking carefully around as they walked. "You know Hogwarts what are you looking for?"

"In each timeline there are two types of changes. There are the blatant ones, like me being alive in this one. However, what a lot of new reapers or even a new implant for a timeline miss are the minor changes. They miss little things that don't seem important but can be. For example, over by the moving staircase, there is a hidden alcove that wasn't in my timeline."

Severus stopped walking. Severus looked around the open area. He watched as a reaper appeared next to the hidden alcove. "Dumbledore knows these areas. He can and will try to use them to regain control. I expect he will try compulsion spells, potions, and even a ritual or two to regain control over me. In a few timelines, he was actually considered a Dark Lord. Voldemort was considered his minion who wanted to rule. The conflict resulted because of it. It was a mess."

"Will they work?" 

"No, as the Master of Death, his magic won't have any effect on me. He might try and guilt you into doing things." 

"He will. He has done it before and will count on that method working." Severus started walking again. "The reapers, are they always around?"

"Yes, reapers are everywhere. At times, they stop someone from doing something stupid. I used to call it luck when I was alive during my original timeline but it was really a reaper keeping me from getting killed. People like to call them guardian angels."


	7. Chapter 7

Once in Severus quarters, Harry aged himself to 18. "Hate being little." 

Severus looked at him. "You look like you did when I saw your death from the Dark Lord."

"Yeah, turns out that death froze my age. Can't age. Something about the Horcrux, Master of Death title, and Dumbledore's guilt trip." Harry looked at Severus. "It's not going to be an issue is it?" 

"No." Severus knew he answered too quickly. Harry clearly didn't believe him as he didn't even believe himself. He liked the looks of an 18-year-old Harry Potter. He certainly didn't look like James Potter. This Harry Potter was almost as tall as he was. The glasses were gone and the hair was long and pulled back. He still had the same coloring as James Potter with Lily's eyes. "You were so small." When Death had shown him the memories, Harry had been so short, so skinny, so frail looking.

"Yeah, Death fixed a lot of issues. This is how I should have looked if Dumbledore hadn't dumped me at dear old Petunia's." Harry liked the look better than his former self. He also didn't like the scar on his forehead and what it meant to the magical world. Dumbledore had turned his life into a circus. 

"How old are you actually?" Severus headed to the small kitchenette. He put on the tea kettle. 

"I'm not sure. I have lived in three different timelines but never got to die of old age. The longest one, I was 54. Some idiot Ginny had decided she now loved worked with her to poison me. I was bored so let it work. So far, Dumbledore, Ginny, and Ron with Hermione killed me. My dear best friends liked being famous and when I didn't want to use my fame, they decided if I died an early death they could remain famous." Harry started opening cabinets to find teacups. Severus pointed to the correct cabinet. 

"Death didn't show me all of that." Severus gathered the tea things and set them on a tray adding some biscuits as they worked. Neither spoke for several minutes. 

"He wouldn't. He knew I would tell you." Harry followed Severus back into the main area of Severus' quarters. "I have some lovely potions I believe will work well."

__________________________________________________________________

"Where did you find this potion?" 

"In one of the timelines where Voldie won. Voldie learned from Granger about DNA. Granger showed him about how everyone's DNA is individual. She showed him how it could create potions designed to target a certain person. Granger in that timeline was worse than Bella. Bella taught Granger magic. Bella hated it but did obey. Granger couldn't as she was a muggle-born. Granger tried hard to rise up the Death Eater structure. Granger remained in the outer section of the Death Eaters. Voldie had her assigned to work with McNair and Yaxley as an assassination team."

"Granger?" Severus was a bit surprised. Severus shouldn't have been surprised. Granger loved authority figures so it seemed possible. Granger, from Death's memories, was a classical know-it-all, who obeyed everything Dumbledore ordered her to do. Voldemort would love someone who blindly obeyed him.

"Yes, she really wanted to be Voldie' wife or something. Bella ended up killing her a few times. Voldie laughed each time Granger died. Granger always kept screaming that she was his number one and deserved the position. She was just as crazy as Bella in that aspect." Harry looked over to Severus as he coated the last of lemon drops with a painful, death potion keyed to Dumbledore. "That happened in a few different timelines by the way. Bella and Granger fighting over Voldie I mean." 

"Does the potion affect anyone else even in a small dosage?" Severus wanted to learn more about this advance that Harry was showing him. He would have to get some muggle science books. 

"No, it doesn't affect anyone else. Voldie and Granger tested it a lot. I think Death might be able to get the notes if we ask. There were other studies they did. I'm not good at the science part but you might understand it." 

"I would enjoy that." 

\---------------------------------------------------------------

Harry and Severus headed to the Great Hall for breakfast. Severus and Harry had a bet on how many times Harry would get angry at Dumbledore and kill him versus just doing it out of the sheer pleasure of killing Dumbledore. Whoever won got to pick the next way Dumbledore would die. 

"I should have brought the gnomes." Harry muttered as they walked. Harry was back to his eleven-year-old self-size. 

Severus hid his smile. They entered the Great Hall where Dumbledore and Minerva were already sitting. "They're early. They are usually at the table a minute or two before breakfast starts." 

"Dumbledore is hoping we had some conflicts so he can play peacemaker." Harry started to skip up to the Head table. As Harry skipped, the hall started to get colder. The Reapers appeared as Dumbledore was turned into a snowman. Once he was a snowman, the heat kicked on and soon Dumbledore was melting. 

"No top hat, carrots for a nose, or coal for the eyes?" Severus looked down at the puddle of melted snow.

"Next time." Harry picked up the carrot and bit it. "I was thinking of pumpkin smashing next."

Suddenly Dumbledore was turned into a pumpkin. A gaudy neon pink pumpkin. "Well, at least he's not orange." Severus held up a summon sledgehammer. "May I?" 

"Sure." Harry stepped aside. Severus took a swing, sending pumpkin pieces everywhere. "Pumpkin Spice Dumbledore." Harry waited as a Reaper repaired Dumbledore and took his turn. "Just think come September we will have Weasley and Granger to play with." 

"You aren't going to wait that long?" Pumpkin was scattered everywhere.

"No. How is your bowling skills?" Harry pulled out a frying pan, picked up some of the pumpkin seeds and started roasting them. 

"Bowling?" Severus wasn't even sure how bowling was going to fit in with Harry killing Dumbledore.

"Dumbledore has on his Chocolate Frog Card that bowling is a favorite hobby. I was thinking how about teaching how what it feels like to be the pin." Harry nodded at the reapers.

"I'm finding I need to improve my bowling skills." Severus watched as the reapers gathered up the pumpkin bits. 

"Bowling tournament?" One of the Senior Reapers pulled out a sheet of parchment. "Week league nights?"

"Sure, why not." Harry liked the idea. "Make sure to add Fate, Time, and Destiny, last time we didn't ask them, they kept moving the bowling alley on us." Harry also didn't want them mad at him. They could make things really hard for him to work in this universe.

"On it Boss!" The Senior Reaper's cloak revealed a new muggle t-shirt that read "death becomes you."


	8. Chapter 8

One of the Senior Reapers appeared. He was wearing today's t-shirt which read "you kill'em, we chill'em."

"It's too early. So what happened?" Harry had just come out of the kitchenette with two mugs of coffee. They had a fun day killing Dumbledore when Harry wasn't in classes with Severus. He saw the twins and Percy in classes. The twins were fun. 

"Time wants to know if bowling can be on Tuesdays but Fate wants Thursday and Destiny wants Sundays." The reaper pulled out the list of people for the league. He handed Harry and Severus their own copies.

"Why not all three nights?" Severus took the mug of coffee held out to him. "I'm sure Harry will find enough pins for everyone." He knew Harry would. When Harry hadn't been tormenting Dumbledore Harry would give him more insights into the different developments in the other timelines. 

"I was actually thinking that if we each have one be the head pin and when the group that knocks the head pin down the most will come in first place. At the end of the season, we group all the head pins together and see if we can destroy the pins." Harry wrote down the group of people, Black, Lupin, Dumbledore, Granger, Molly, Ron, Ginny, Petunia, Vernon, Dudley, and his group of friends. Harry knew it was personal with some of the people on the list but that was why he was here.

"Oh, I like that. I want to head the team that has any of the Marauders." Severus added Voldemort, Bella, and a few other Death Eaters to the list as well as the Marauders. He was looking forward to bowling.

"I was thinking we could rotate each week that way we all can get a shot at them." Harry made another note on the parchment.

"I will pass it on, Boss. It's an excellent idea." The Senior Reaper disappeared as he took their notes. 

___________________________________________________________________

"You what?" Harry thought he might need his hearing checked.

"I invited Ron and Ginny here for the next few days to play with you." Dumbledore seemed quite pleased with his newest plan.

Harry blinked a few times. They had been a bit surprised to find Molly, Ginny, and Ron at the head table when they arrived. Molly had been lecturing the twins on something when she spotted Harry. Molly turned her attention to Dumbledore and Harry. "You want me to play with the two of them?" 

"Yeah, mate, we can go and play some Quidditch. I will show you how to fly." Ron looked very pleased with himself. He was going to be friends with Harry Potter.

"You want me to get on a broom and chase a flying gold object around? No, I have a better idea." Harry wasn't about to allow Dumbledore, Molly, or Ron to decide who his friends were. "Why don't we go outside?"

Severus was going to enjoy this. He could see Dumbledore believed his plan worked as the old man beamed a smile at Molly that said: "see it will work out." Severus knew it wasn't going to work out the way Molly or Dumbledore wanted.

_____________________________________________________________________

"What's wrong with my Ronny?" Molly was standing next to Dumbledore and Madam Pomfrey. They had been summoned up to the infirmary by Madam Pomfrey. Madam Pomfrey had finished her scans and had given them potions. 

"He has Acromantula venom running through his system, he is in shock. I have already given him the antidote but he will need at least two weeks to fully recover. The poison has been removed but his body needs time to recover."

"Ginny?" 

"If Otis hadn't pulled her away from the mermaids, I'm afraid she would have drowned. What were they doing on those brooms?" Madam Pomfrey had already given each child a Dreamless Sleep potion.

"I thought they were playing with Harry but Harry was with the twins all morning. Percy had reported the twins were showing Harry some pranks." Dumbledore wasn't sure what happened. He, himself, was a bit sore. He felt like his body had been squeezed by Otis. 

**************Flashback***************************

 

Severus watched Ron Weasley hand Harry a broom. Harry smirked. "You two first. Give me a demonstration." Severus wondered if anyone ever realized demon was in the word demonstration? He had seen how eager the two youngest Weasleys were to have Harry as their friend. Ron was annoying while Ginny was staring at Harry as Ron had shown Harry where the brooms where kept. The girl had attached herself to Harry. Harry had to keep removing the girl's hand and arms from him numerous times. Once the duo was airborne Harry sat down next to Severus. Harry saw the reapers appear. It was time for some fun. "Ron is petrified of spiders. Ginny and Dumbledore are about to revisit Black Lake." 

"4th year?" Severus was going to make sure Otis was very healthy as he had a feeling they would be using Otis a lot.

"Yes. So who do you want?" 

"Decisions, decisions. Why not all three for different three rounds? Ronald can enjoy some of Black Lake. We can have Otis collect them for us. I'm sure Otis wouldn't mind repaying Dumbledore for his lack of care regarding the animals in Black Lake. It will also keep the reapers from getting wet." 

"Bonus points if Otis drowns them a few times as he rescues them?" Harry could see Black Lake from where they were sitting. He knew Otis was bored. He had feed Otis a few times after he finished Hogwarts. He even played with Otis by throwing balls into the water for Otis to fetch. "We will need a better viewing point."

"True, top of the stands should do for us reviewing the events. Otis gets to squeeze Dumbledore as a reward, each time." Severus was sure Otis would even squeeze Dumbledore to death a few extra times.

"How about getting eaten by the mermaids?" Harry knew the mermaids would enjoy a chance to torment Dumbledore.

"Let me get some gillyweed and we can watch from down there." 

"No need." Harry held up the Elder Wand. "You won't drown with me and we don't have to eat that nasty stuff."

"Win-win." Severus was really enjoying this Harry Potter. Who knew a Potter could be so interesting.

****************End Flashback**********************

Severus covered his yawn as he entered the Infirmary. He had another antidote potion for Ron. The reapers had provided it but he had to keep up appearance. 

"Where is Harry?" Dumbledore thought Harry was with Severus. 

"Wasn't he with Ron and Ginny?" Molly started to panic.

"He's taking a nap. We had a busy day. The damage from his relatives will take a while to repair." Severus had reported to Dumbledore that he was working on fixing the issues with Harry's health. Dumbledore had believed him as Minerva kept commenting on Harry's abusive relatives.

"So he wasn't with Ron and Ginny?" Dumbledore needed the boy to be friends with Ron and Ginny for his plans to work and not associate with Severus. He had hoped that Harry would be an exceptional flyer like his father. He wanted to be able to promote how wonderful Harry was.

"No, they wanted to go flying and Harry took one look at the brooms. He asked for a demonstration and while they were in the air, he left." Severus really wanted to laugh. Harry was actually out with Death sorting souls. Severus and Otis with some of the reapers had a blast. They even had a throwing contest. Otis had to use each of his tentacles to throw Dumbledore, Ron, and Ginny. They bet on who would go the furthest.

"I see."

"Albus, I checked the broom with Filius' aid, and we found nothing wrong with them." Madam Hooch had arrived shortly after Severus and really didn't want to remain any longer than necessary. She had never really been impressed with Dumbledore.

"Thank you for checking Rolanda." Dumbledore wasn't sure what was going on. They still hadn't been able to find the Weasley's house. It had taken most of the night to get Molly's mouth returned and now this. He hadn't even thought of Harry until Severus arrived. He believed that Harry had been with Ron and Ginny. 

"I have a potion brewing." Severus was about to leave when a group of Reapers appeared. Harry must have had an idea. 

Dumbledore started laughing. "Albus, this isn't funny." Molly scolded but she suddenly started laughing. 

Poppy pulled out her wand. "I detect no-" Time froze as Severus and the Reapers watched Dumbledore and Molly die from laughing. 

"Boss got the idea while Death was talking about the good old days." One of the Senior Reapers informed Severus. 

"What is your name? I can't keep calling you Reaper." 

"I'm Phil, that is Mort, over there is Annie, Tippy is behind you." 

"Tippy?"

"Nickname. He was a bit tipsy when he was reaped." Phil explained. 

"So death by laughter isn't new?" 

"Nope but one of the oldest weirdest death. Some time back in third century B.C. A Greek philosopher named Chrysippus died from laughing too hard. The idiot gave his donkey some wine and he just started laughing hysterically after seeing his donkey try to feed on Ficus Carica." {Ficus Carica is a fig.} 

"So how many points did he win for this one?"

"Death gave him extra for revisiting an oldie." Phil and the reapers started to reset everything. "Repeat?" 

"Yes, that would lovely." Severus had to admit watching Dumbledore die was getting addicting.


	9. Chapter 9

Harry yawned as he made his way to breakfast with Severus. They entered the Great Hall to see Hermione sitting between Dumbledore and Minerva. Time froze as Dumbledore was killed by his beard, again. "That one will never get old." Harry loved Dumbledore's beard killing Dumbledore.

"This must be his backup plan since his other two idiots are in the Infirmary." Severus watched the reapers appear and fix everything. "One more time." Severus was really enjoying this. He had always thought about having Dumbledore strangled by his own beard every time Dumbledore had annoyed him beyond his normal annoyance factor.

Harry smirked. Dumbledore's beard turned into two giant hands and began to strangle him. "Have to remember that one." 

"Master, no points, on the first one." Death looked like an old man today. "Bowling is set up for tonight. It will be at nine. Time has agreed to allow us to bowl in the time suspension universe. All three of them will be there tonight." 

"Nice. So I take it she liked the chocolate?" Harry knew the three sisters were going to enjoy bowling. Dumbledore had ruined many of their plans. 

"Loved them. Tippy and his crew will be with you all day." Death disappeared as Tippy waved. 

"Harry, my boy, I want to introduce you to Hermione Granger. I figured she could help you get caught up with any school work."

"Not your boy. Why?" Harry took his seat as far away from Dumbledore and Granger as possible. Minerva glared at Harry which Harry returned. He wasn't going to allow Minerva's love of Dumbledore to change his attitude. 

"Well, I'm a muggle-born so I can help you with your muggle assignments and we can study our first-year books before we start here." 

"I have my A levels. So what did you plan on teaching me? I was going to be attending Oxford in September until that clown dragged me here. Guess another thing that Dumbledore missed. Well, at least I know it wasn't just the abuse that Dumbledore missed. I still haven't decided if I will remain." 

"Oh. That sounds very interesting. What are you hoping to study?" Hermione glanced at Dumbledore. 

"See I knew you two would get along wonderfully. She can help you study and pass whatever muggle testing is required."

"Headmaster, he is finished with basic muggle studies. He was going to be heading to university in September until you got him. He is accepted at one of the top universities in the world." Hermione feared she was going to be sent back home when she really wanted to get access to the Hogwarts' library. 

"Well, then perhaps you can spend time getting ready for September." Dumbledore smiled.

"Not likely, I already told you I wouldn't trust anyone you recommend. Besides, as I said, I might not be attending. I want to study law." Harry watched as one of the reapers disappeared to create the required paperwork. 

"Harry, my boy, you need to train your magic. You don't want it to cause problems later." 

"I'm sure I can hire a tutor. Hey Sevvie, you want a new job?" 

"I have enough jobs as it is." Severus did wonder what Dumbledore would have done if he had said yes. 

Granger looking at Dumbledore decided to try again. "Have you read Hogwarts: A History?" She held up the book.

The book came alive and started attacking her. The rest of the books in her satchel came alive and started to attack Dumbledore and Granger. "That is original." Severus straightened up a bit to look over Harry's head to see Granger screaming as she was being eaten by her books. Dumbledore had a brain and had started to run. The books were worse than Hagrid's book for Harry's third year as they grew arms and legs. The books were throwing food and anything else they could grab as they chased Dumbledore. 

"I think I deserve extra points on it." 

"I am sure Death will agree. Shall we do it again with the books in the library?" 

"Oh, yes, and maybe have some of them send spells at them?" Harry was wondering how many spells he could hit Dumbledore in less than a minute.

"Indeed." Breakfast continued with Hermione trying and failing to gain Harry's friendship. Instead, Harry and Severus talked about potions and each time she tried to interrupt they stared at her until she shut up.

___________________________________________________________________

A house elf popped into Severus' classroom during his fourth year Ravenclaw and Slytherin class. Harry was over in a corner reading one of the ancient text that he borrowed from Dumbledore's office that Dumbledore didn't know he borrowed. Harry had already arranged for all of his books and items to be returned. The elf took one look at Harry, make an eep, handed a note to Severus and left. Severus waited until the students were gathering their ingredients before reading the note. He discreetly handed the note to Harry before continuing his lesson. Harry read the letter.

Severus

I would like to speak to you regarding Harry at the earliest opportunity. Hermione and Harry can engage in something fun while we talk.

Albus

PS I'm feeling a bit like a Tootsie Pop

Harry muttered about needing to go bowling. He really wanted to have the real Dumbledore as his target for his bowling ball. After a few more classes, Severus had a free slot. They headed to his office. "What do you plan on doing?" 

"I got a few reapings I need to do. If he asks, say you don't know where I disappeared to. It will drive him nuts. I'm going to make sure Voldie can't come to Hogwarts in another timeline. I think I will also make sure to have some of the other Harrys give him a hard time."

______________________________________________

Death and Harry were staring at the wraith form of Voldie. "That is just not a good look. Honestly Voldie, what were you thinking?" 

Voldemort wraith soared at Harry. The wraith went through Harry's body. It realized that nothing occurred looked confused. "Not very bright is he, Master?" 

"No. However, it's been almost ten years just sitting here." Harry looked at Voldie wraith form and Death. "Death, how about we have more fun with Dumbledore using Voldie?" 

Death smirked. "It would drive him nuts." 

"So Voldie here is the deal. He's Death, I'm the Master of -" The wraith form of Voldie tried to float away. "-that isn't going to work. Now, as I was saying, how would you like to torment Dumbledore?" Harry was going to love this plan.

The Voldie wraith suddenly looked very interested. It gave them a look of continue. Voldie always wanted to torment Dumbledore. He had tried to get the man out of Hogwarts and the magical government for decades.

"Good. The basic idea is we want to drive Dumbledore insane." Harry could see the wraith form was very interested. "I'm sure you figured out we know about your little treasures."

The Voldie wraith bobbed its head. He knew there wasn't anything that Death wouldn't know about his soul, life, and even his death.

"We won't reap you as long as you don't try to do anything stupid like gathering up your Death Eaters or try to kill anyone unless it's on our approved list." Harry explained how they stopped time to kill certain people over and over. Harry ignored the gleam in Voldie wraith's eyes. "You do anything to break our rules I will reap so fast with no second chances."

Harry really didn't have a grudge against Voldemort. Voldemort had tried to kill him a few times but Dumbledore was the one who painted a target on him. Dumbledore also kept the target on Harry. Harry fell for all of Dumbledore's lies. Voldie never hid his agenda as Dumbledore did. Voldemort was just insane because of all his Horcruxes but didn't mean Harry wasn't above using the man. "Good. Now, where is Nagini?" Harry looked around. ~Nagini, I'm not here to hurt you or Tom. We are leaving with Tom and want to take you with us.~

The huge snake peeked its head out from its burrow. ~No killing Nagini?~

~No. How would you like to terrorize some Order members?~

Nagini was out of her burrow and by Voldie's form. ~Let's go.~

____________________________________________

Meanwhile:

Severus arrived at his meeting with Dumbledore. "Albus."

"Lemon drop?" 

"No, thank you." Severus saw Tippy behind Dumbledore. Tippy was looking very eager. Severus gave a slight nod of his head. Dumbledore was hanging upside down being beaten by lemon drops. "I will have to show Harry."

"All in a day's work." Tippy and the other reapers were enjoying themselves. They never got to this type of work. It was more interesting than reaping dead people. Tippy did a reset.

"Severus, I'm quite worried about Harry. He doesn't care for children his own age. He has already made it very clear that he doesn't like Ron, Ginny, Molly, or Hermione." 

Severus wondered when or if Dumbledore would ever add his own name to the list. "He seems to get along with the twins, Bill, Charlie, and Arthur." Severus knew Hermione, Ron, Ginny, and Molly were the paid pawns of his. He wondered if Dumbledore was going to try and bring the Wolf into this mess. He hoped so. 

"He needs friends his own age. Friends who can keep him from being corrupted by the dark forces."

Severus resisted the urge to do a Star Wars remark. Death certainly provided him with some interesting information. "Albus, you left him to be abused. Kids his own age won't understand him and he won't understand them. He is a lot older than ten." A lot older, Severus mentally added. Severus had a feeling he should add a few centuries to Harry's age.

"We need to work on that attitude of his. I can't allow it to continue. He is so disrespectful." 

"Only towards you and anyone you throw at him. He listens to me, surprisingly." Severus knew that ought to confuse Dumbledore. "He talks a bit to Filius too." Filius and Harry had had a long conversation in the staff room that morning about charm theories. This was information he knew Dumbledore wouldn't want to hear. Dumbledore wanted Harry to be linked to Gryffindor and have only Gryffindor friends. "Don't try to make him into a lion. It will backfire. He isn't a Gryffindor." Harry wasn't like James either and Severus knew that bothered Dumbledore. Dumbledore wanted a mini-James. 

"He needs to be guided by me. You know Vold-"

"Don't." Severus warned. He wished Harry was here to kill the man.

"He will return." Dumbledore looked at Severus' left forearm. "We need Harry to be ready for when he does." 

Severus strongly resisted the urge to roll his eyes. "I'm sure if you don't force Harry into a mold you want he will be willing to listen to you." Not likely but it was fun to let Dumbledore had his dreams. Severus looked at Tippy. Tippy nodded his agreement and Dumbledore started choking on his lemon drop. Harry was right, death by lemon drops was going to be a favorite.

"That will never get old. I hate those things." Severus informed Tippy.

"We have bowling tonight too." Tippy did the reset. 

"Albus, don't push him. You have seen how he is reacting, give him time to adjust, get over his anger. September is not for another eleven months." 

"Talk to him. Try to get him to see I didn't want him to be abused." 

Severus refrained from pulling his wand out and killing the man. He slammed down his anger. "I will talk to him." Severus got up and left before he sent the killing curse at Dumbledore. He was going to use some of those special potions on Dumbledore.


	10. Chapter 10

Severus arrived back in his quarter to find Death, Harry, and some floating wraith thing. It looked like the Dark Lord. "Do I want to know?" He watched Death chuckle and head to his kitchen.

"Sev, meet the new Voldie. I went to another timeline and we are borrowing him. Dumbledore wants me to have friends my own age. He is going to be my new friend." Harry laid a book on the table. "Death is going to bring him back and we need to de-age him." 

"I see. He's not-" Severus was hoping that they weren't planning on releasing a psycho Dark Lord. Dumbledore would be in his glory as he would brag about how he was right about the Dark Lord returning.

"Nope, no Death Eaters, no taking over the world plans. He does want to join us on the killing of Dumbledore and the bowling league." Harry moved the wraith form over a set of runes that Death had drawn on the floor. It was set in a circle with the symbols of death inside the circle that had the life rune on it.

"Do those runes come up?" Severus hoped so or Dumbledore would know something was up. He also didn't want to deal with being a spy if they had another war. Dumbledore would want him to spy on the Dark Lord while keeping Harry safe.

"Yes. I added some protection wards to your quarters. Dumbledore won't know anything that goes on in here." Death came out of the kitchen holding some bundles of sage. "We created a new identity for our Voldie here. How do you feel about having two wards?"

"Two?" Severus was now officially confused. He didn't even have one.

"Yes. I put in the paperwork for you to attain custody of Harry James Potter and his friend, Mortem Vulgata. It was granted by the way."

"So I'm now their guardian. Death Revisited for a name? Dumbledore is going to suspect something. Dumbledore will be actively looking for a way to confirm his belief that the Dark Lord was going to return." Severus, without thinking, took the potions that they would need and added them to the ritual circle. 

"I told you but those two thought it was a great idea." Harry pointed at Death who was now placing candles around the wraith form. They were candles they had gotten them from Fate. They were almost clear in coloring. If you held them up to the light you could have seen through them.

"You have another idea?" Death looked at Severus.

"Yes. One of my young cousins died a few years ago. Dumbledore knew his name but didn't know he passed on. I could claim I got custody. His name was Sebastian Prince."

"I can change it." Death disappeared for a second. "Fixed and approval granted. You are officially their guardians."

"I don't think I will get used to that." Severus wondered how soon Dumbledore would discover this new information.

Harry laughed. "Let's get Voldie fixed. I haven't killed Dumbledore in a few hours and am going through withdrawals."

"Bowling in a few hours too. The Reapers have us as captains of teams. The Union Reps having their own teams too. Fate, Time, and Destiny will share a team since they only can do one night a week after tonight." Death finished the setup. "Ready?"

"What do I need to do?" Severus saw Harry was at the apex of rune sequence. 

Harry changed into his older self. "Stand behind me. Death will be on the opposite end. Voldie wraith will remain in the middle. When you see the body is fully formed you will need to cast a sleep spell on it." 

"I can handle that." Severus got into position.

"It won't take long as most of it already done. We just need to chant a few lines and poof instant body." Death changed his form so that he now looked like Merlin, a young Merlin with black hair and matching beard. 

"Please tell me you weren't Merlin?" Severus looked at Death with an arched brow.

"I wasn't. Harry was." Death shrugged his shoulders. 

"I was bored." Harry shrugged his shoulders as if to say can you blame me?

"Yes, of course, I should have realized that." Severus rolled his eyes. "Anyone else you might have played in the past I should know about?" 

"Not really sure. I've played in many alternate timelines." Harry laughed. "It will be fun to find out."

The Voldie Wraith bobbed up and down. "Yes, yes, we know. Let's get his body back." Death rolled his eyes. "He never had any patience." 

Death started chanting in ancient Greek as Harry chanted in ancient Hebrew. Severus couldn't understand a word they were saying but Severus cast the sleep spell as soon as the body was formed. "How long?" 

"Not long. It's more to keep him from being in pain as the body finishes." Death, with his forefinger, wrote the runic form of life on Voldie's forehead. The sign was written in rose petal water.

Harry knelt by the new body of Voldie and pulled out the Elder Wand. "My turn." Harry began to cast a series of spells on the body. 

Severus recognized one of the spells that Healers used to give dementia patients a clearer mind. He also recognized another one that was a bit older and not used so much. It was originally used to give patients a sense of peace and tranquility. "To keep him from going on murderous rages?" 

"Exactly. Most of the reasons he was like how he behaved weren't because of anything he did but what was done to him. Dumbledore didn't help either. He wanted Voldie crazy and kept returning him to that orphanage. Same as he did you to your home and me to my relatives." 

Severus wasn't surprised. Dumbledore had been knocked off of any pedestal he had placed him on when Death provided him with Harry's memories. "So when will Dumbledore get the notice about the new guardianship?" 

"Right before dinner. I'm sure it will make an interesting meal." Harry laid his hand on the rune that Death had placed and started chanting a healing chant. 

When Harry was finished the new Sebastian Prince began to wake up. Sebastian had the black hair from the Prince line but thankfully not the nose. Sebastian had a full mouth, high cheekbones, and a clear, almost porcelain like skin complexion. He was tall like Tom Riddle and Severus were. He was lean but not skinny. He looked like all arms and legs but in time the body would grow to fit the arms and legs. Sebastian opened his eyes and they were the deep chocolate brown that Severus had. 

"He could be a Prince." Severus couldn't believe how much he looked like a Prince. No one would have any doubts about Sebastian being a relative of Severus.

"Well, technically the Gaunt and Prince line came from the same line over a thousand years ago." Death helped Sebastian sit up. "You will get your energy back in a minute."

"Thank you. Being a wraith wasn't pleasant. Where is Nagini?"

"She is sleeping. Something about finally getting a good sleep." Harry pointed over to the far corner where Severus finally noticed the huge snake curled up. 

"How did I miss her?" 

"Death has her masked so that only we can see her. I think he just remembered to allow you when Sebastian mentioned her." Harry started to clean up the mess from the ritual while Death carried Sebastian to the couch. 

"Let's work on our story." Severus sat down in his favorite chair, opposite the couch. 

___________________________________________________________

Sebastian and Harry walked with Severus to the Great Hall. Students were wondering who would willingly join Severus in any form, they were also wondering why Harry Potter was with Severus if you listened to the gossip mill. 

"This is going to be fun. May I kill him first?" Sebastian quietly asked Harry.

"Sure. Unless he pushes my temper, again." Harry knew he had a bad temper when it came to Dumbledore.

"He does have that habit." Severus added. "I still want to see you drop a house on him. I wished I had seen the earlier one." 

"Oh, that sounds like fun. Wizard of Oz?" Sebastian looked at Harry. He had able to sneak into a movie theater when he was younger to watch the movie. The orphanage didn't care what he did as long as he wasn't around them. 

"Yes. I almost gave him a pair of ruby slippers but wasn't sure if he would get the reference." 

Severus and Sebastian snorted, not that they would admit that. They entered the Great Hall. "Oh, he is mad." 

"Yes, he is. It's a good look for him." Harry skipped up to the table. 

"Are we sure he isn't the crazy one?" Sebastian watched Harry.

"No. However, we are agreeing to this plot so I'm not guaranteeing our sanity."


	11. Chapter 11

Harry stood on one of the chairs in the bowling alley. "Everyone the rules are a bit different. There is one Dumbledore head pin for each alley. Whoever hits it gets 10 points toward the end of the year trophy but not on the scorecard. The scoring will remain the same. You will also notice we have the big and small balls."

Death held up one of each while one of the reapers held up the neon pink Dumbledore pins. "You can't miss it." 

"It will rotate position in the lineup." Harry pointed to the alleys. "If you want to put up the bumpers, feel free. Now, below the balls, you will notice different things from bats to clubs, even a variety of different type of balls. They are to be used on the minion pins. The minions are the major players in the Death Eaters or Order. You get five points for each one you kill using the more creative ways."

"He means knock down." 

"Yeah, knock down." Harry rolled his eyes. "A list of the major players is on the score tables. Those scores will be automatic so don't worry about counting them." 

"Teams have to create their own names." Death announced. "At the end of the tournament, a trophy will be given to the first place team and one to the top scores on the wall of death." Death pointed to the scoreboard that had Dumbledore, Granger, Ron, Ginny, Molly, Remus, Voldemort, Fenrir, Bella, and the list went down. "Those below the red line get one point."

"So basically knocking down a pin will get you points." Harry summed up. "Remember it's fun but do aim to destroy the pins. Please do not destroy the bowling alley." Soon everyone was ready. Harry looked down at the bowling shoes. "We will need to go and get our own equipment." 

"I agree." Sebastian looked around. He had seen the Voldemort pin but no one seemed to care that he was present. He glanced at Severus who was already was standing on the parque and lining up his shot to take out Dumbledore. "Severus is very eager." 

"Dumbledore has been trying to get me to be friends with the Weasleys and Granger. He wants me to have friends my own age." Harry laughed a bit. "My own age." Harry laughed again. "If he only knew." 

Sebastian went to his own team and soon everyone was aiming for Dumbledore. Time even sent her ball three lanes over to Death's lane to knock down Dumbledore before Death did. "That's illegal!" Death pointed to the smashed pin of Dumbledore.

"Nothing in the rulebook against it." Time danced a bit. 

"Yes, there is. You have to keep your ball in your alley." Death pulled out the rulebook.

"It wasn't my ball. It was Tippy's." Time pointed to a mystified Tippy who was looking for his ball. 

Harry picked up a cricket bat and skidded down to Time's pins, smashing Dumbledore and the rest of them. "Yes!" 

"No fair, I wanted to hit him!" Phil picked up a cricket ball and threw it down his alley and got a strike. "Racking up the points, baby." 

"Let's get back to the game." Death got pelted by tennis balls. 

"He is right. As much fun as that was we do need to at least attempt to play by the rules." Harry quickly danced from alley to alley smashing Dumbledore. "It won't count." He assured everyone as they were screaming foal at him as he finally made it back to his alley. "We will reset and start again in five minutes. Let everyone get killing Dumbledore out of their system."

Severus picked up the heaviest cricket bat he could find and marched down his alley. He picked up Dumbledore pin. He grinned as he placed it in front of him. He proceeded to bash it to bites. 

"I think Severus is a wee bit annoyed at Dumbledore." Sebastian's eyes were on Severus. "He was never like that before." 

"Dinner." Harry saw Sebastian understood why Severus was so angry. While Dumbledore hadn't outwardly done anything he had made his displeasure known with snide comments about Severus all meal. Dumbledore commented ranged from making sure his new wards didn't dress all in black or green or keeping them in the potion labs. Minerva put an end to the jabs when Harry made the comment that it would be better than being beaten. 

Sebastian walked down his alley. He picked up the Dumbledore pin and lined it up for Severus to smash before the real game of bowling started. "Feel better?" Sebastian asked a smiling Severus after he was done.

"I do. I haven't felt this good in decades." Severus knew he was smiling but he didn't care. He felt lighter than he had since before his fifth year at Hogwarts. "We are going to have to do this before every bowling night starts." 

"Agreed." Was heard around the bowling alley. 

Harry smirked Death. "See. I told you it wasn't just me." 

___________________________________________________________

Severus woke Harry and Sebastian up early the next morning. "I have the first session." 

"Coffee, I need coffee." Harry moaned into his pillow. 

"Is it even daylight?" Sebastian groaned from across the room. They were sharing a room since Dumbledore only provided the one extra bedroom. Harry could have added another one but he didn't want to give Dumbledore another reason to harass Severus. It would also take care of having a friend issue.

"If we time it right we can miss Dumbledore arriving for breakfast. So get a move on." Severus wasn't up for dealing with Dumbledore and his idiotic plans. "He will bring Granger to breakfast and the annoying Weasleys." That got Harry and Sebastian out of bed. The Weasleys were released from Poppy's care last night but Poppy didn't want them to attend dinner so they were in guest quarters with their mother. Molly had been unbearable when she was around them.

"He is going to force us to spend time with them?" Sebastian put on his robe. They headed out to the kitchenette.

"Yes. We can have some fun." Harry quickly explained why the Weasleys had been in the infirmary. 

"Juliet, she is the Basilisk, she might like some fun too." Sebastian suggested as they were drinking some coffee. Nagini was curled around the warming rock in front of the fireplace. "Nagini can go and speak to her." 

"I could use some her parts for potions." Severus had wanted to experiment with Basilisk parts but they were expensive. "We also could make some money off of the skin she shed. We set up a separate vault, allow the goblins and Potion Masters' Guild auction it off, Dumbledore would never know about the funds. He wouldn't even be concerned with any part of it if they did it. He might wonder where they got the parts but he wouldn't link it to us." 

"I like." Harry knew it would annoy Dumbledore to have the potion market using Basilisk parts and scales. "I say we use all the Horcruxes things. I know he believes they are Horcruxes and he goes to check on them. They are things that the Voldemort of this world used to trap traitors, not the real Horcruxes."

"It might be hard to figure out when he goes but I'm sure the reapers will be able to alert us." Severus began to go through the memories that Death gave him. "Also, we can use the Deathly Hollows. He honestly believes he can become the Master of Death by just getting his hands on the three items." 

"True, he does. We can also handle his pets. I know Granger won't go flying but if the two idiots want to go flying again we can have all three of them enjoy Black Lake.' 

"Feeling lazy?" Severus watched Harry yawn. 

"I don't think I should have challenge Time to a drinking contest last night. No hangover but it always makes me tired." Harry wasn't a drinker normally. Time, however, always had drinking contests.

"She left you a message about making sure you brought the good stuff next time." Death appeared. "Last night winner was Severus, followed by you, Master." 

"We do need to celebrate." Harry bounced a bit in his chair. "Something to leave an impression on Dumbledore." 

"Cricket bats for all?" Severus suggested. 

"I was thinking about a house, ruby slippers, flying monkeys." Sebastian whistled the theme song to "The Wizard Of Oz."

"I want to see the flying monkeys." Severus wanted to see the flying monkeys carry Dumbledore away. "Wonder if he would melt if we poured water on him."

"We can find out." Harry started to make an imaginary list of ways to kill Dumbledore. 

"We better go or he will be there." Severus looked at Death. "Don't suppose you could arrange for him to fall down the stairs by his guardian?" 

"I could." Death looked at Phil. Phil looked eager to do the job. "I think Phil and Tippy would like that assignment." 

"I say have two on permanent stair duty for him." Harry saw some group of reapers start bidding for the duty. He knew Dumbledore wasn't going to be able to walk down a flight of stairs without falling down them.

They headed out to the Great Hall. Harry nudged Sebastian as they saw Granger coming down the stairs. "I forgot she is always early so she can read at the table."

"Harry, Harry, I was hoping to see you-" Granger was rushing down the stairwell.

"Here I was hoping to avoid you." Harry wasn't quite so everyone heard him. 

Granger looked shocked but Sebastian continued Harry's thought. "I thought we were heading to breakfast to avoid them." 

"You two can come to my classroom if they bother you." Severus knew they would be joining him. They continued on leaving a sputtering Granger going on about them being rude.

Harry tilted his head everyone watched as Granger's mouth got bigger and bigger until the lips swallowed Granger. "That was original." Sebastian watched the reapers appear and fix everything. "They do that every time?"

"Yes, they do. They're union too." Severus explained. 

They were in the Great Hall when the reset happened. Harry let out a groan. "This isn't our morning." Dumbledore, with Molly Weasley, was sitting at the far right side of the head table while Ron and Ginny were sitting down by the far left end of the table. It was the end that Severus sat at. Harry glared at Dumbledore. 

Dumbledore was suddenly slammed against the wall behind him and an apple placed on his head. Everyone was frozen as Death handed out bows. "Headshot is ten points, heart twenty, everywhere else is five point. You have ten minutes." Death instructed.

Severus, Sebastian, and Harry noticed the arrows had different color tips. "Poisoned?"

"Of course, Master."

"Winner gets to decide how we kill the annoying Weasleys." Harry took his position, fired his arrow. "Yes, head." 

"My turn." Sebastian stepped up between the Gryffindor and Slytherin table. He aimed. "Head!" 

Severus rolled his eyes. "Watch how a professional does it." Severus stepped up and aimed. The arrow went true and hit Dumbledore in his heart. "See, that is how it's done." 

"Impressive. Another round, we still have time." Harry pointed to the timer Death had set up next to the scoreboard. "Let the contest begin."

Ten min. later:

"He got the heart every time." Harry couldn't believe Severus won. 

"I know. I wasn't expecting it." Sebastian was watching Severus as they waited for reset. "So what are we doing to the annoying Weasleys?"

"I will inform you after breakfast." Severus moved the two Weasleys to sit down in chairs by their mother as they took their seats. "I want to be able to eat."


	12. Chapter 12

"Sebastian, Harry, I believe a trip to visit the Chamber is necessary." Severus waited until they were out of the Great Hall. "I need some venom for the required potion." Severus was going to have to find a gift for Death and the reapers. They were making his life so much more exciting.

Harry and Sebastian exchanged a look. "My second year. I like. How long?" Harry was trying to remember how long it took the mandrakes to mature in order for the potion to be made. While they weren't using the Basilisk it would certainly look like a Basilisk did the damage.

"I checked with Pomona and she doesn't have any Mandrakes. She would need to special order them. So about ten months. I figure we can also use them to test bowling bowls out with their statued form." Severus left off other things they would test on the statues.

"The potion to cure them wouldn't be ready in time to start our first year. That could certainly take care of the trio. Dumbledore might bring in Lupin before my first year." Harry grinned. He knew his voice was filled with excitement. "Which would mean a lot more fun. I have this cool potion that we can make him transfer into anything but a werewolf during that time of the month. It works a lot like a poly-juice but it lasts for eight hours." 

"I'm sure we can come up with an interesting list of things to transform him into." Severus started making his own list of potions to try on Lupin. He was going to enjoy getting some revenge toward Lupin.

"Have the elves line his bed linens with silver flakes, wash his clothing in silver, put silver in his body products." Sebastian was going to enjoy this. He could see Severus and Harry were enjoying his ideas. He got to be himself and people who supported his ideas. "Nagini could assist us too. She would love to help. Let's go and see how much venom, skin, and other items Mary is willing to donate."

"Mary was always willing to assist in the other words." Harry glance around. "The Reapers can add some protection about the Chamber to prevent Dumbledore from getting close." 

_____________________________________________________

"What is wrong with them?" Molly's voice reached a new high. She was looking at three statues. Her youngest two and Hermione Granger. Hermione looked like she was about to hit someone while it appeared that her Ronny was yelling. Her daughter was standing with her hands on her hips. Molly had been summoned to the Infirmary as she was setting up their new quarters in the Gryffindor Tower. The older boys would be staying with Arthur's aunt as was Arthur during the week. Arthur would be at Hogwarts during the weekend. She wasn't sure if Bill or Charlie would join them.

Dumbledore was a bit stumped. He had found the three surrounded by Gryffindors in the common room. He had been summoned there after Percy complained about his brother. Minerva had assisted him in getting the three of them to the Infirmary. She had a class so didn't stay very long but warned him that this was his own fault. 

"They're petrified. I'm not sure how or why it happened but they are." Poppy was reading her scanning results. "I will have to speak to Severus about the potion. I already spoke to St. Mungos and they won't have any solution available for almost a year."

Severus entered the Infirmary. "Ah, Severus, just the person we needed to speak to." Dumbledore looked around. "Where are Harry and Sebastian? I thought they were with you."

"They are bottling up the potions we were working on when you summoned me. Poppy, I am almost done with your list of potions." Severus looked at the three statues. "Well, they never looked better nor so well behaved." 

"They have been petrified. St. Mungos doesn't have the cure nor will they for at least a year. They informed us that their suppliers don't have any mandrakes and it would take six weeks to get immature ones. They said it would be about 11 months for them to mature. We were wondering how soon can you make the cure?"

"Does Pomona have mandrakes?" Severus could see Dumbledore frown. Severus knew from the memories of the other alternate timelines that Dumbledore arranged to have mandrakes for Harry's second year. It was arranged after Ginny started her first year. There wasn't any evidence that he knew the students would be petrified but the man knew there was a Basilisk in the Chamber of Secrets.

Time froze suddenly and Severus felt earmuffs on his ears as a giant Mandrake started screeching. Dumbledore tried to run but fell over with blood running out of his ears. The Mandrake started to dance a bit. "Damn, missed it." Harry was standing in the doorway with Sebastian.

"Language." Severus watched the reapers started to clean up. "I wasn't expecting that."

"I thought of it after you left." Harry stepped over the corpse of Dumbledore. "So we did get all three. Nice."

"Yes. He is thinking of something." Severus knew Dumbledore wasn't going to allow his pets to stay petrified.

"Most likely he has some contacts he is trying to think of to get mandrakes or the cure." Sebastian kicked Dumbledore. He looked at one of the reapers. "Flying Monkeys?" 

"Oh, yes." Harry snapped his fingers and they were out in a field. Dumbledore was very confused. "He can't see us." 

"Where are we?" Severus looked up at the sky. He really wanted to see the Flying Monkeys.

"Forest of Dean." Harry pointed to the sky. The monkeys were incoming. You could just start to hear the beating of the wings. "We still need to find a pair of ruby slippers for him." 

The Monkeys were Howler Monkeys and started making howling as soon as they saw Dumbledore. Dumbledore tried to pull out his wand but was having problems finding it. The trio looked over to their left and found Tippy holding it while Phil was taking bets on which monkey would get Dumbledore first. 

"I knew you would do it." Death appeared behind them. "You deserve double points for it." 

"I do, don't I." Harry beamed a smile as Dumbledore was trying to avoid the wings and claws of the monkeys. "I say the big guy will get him." 

"The one with the red pointy hat. Winner gets to pick the next Wizard of Oz reference we use?" Severus suggested.

"Agreed. I go with the green pointy hat." Sebastian watched the bets being shifted around on the board that the Reapers were using. 

"Death, can you keep him from finding any Mandrakes?" Harry saw his monkey snatch Dumbledore up and throw him against a tree. "We do need to do this again." 

"Reset?" Death suggested. Death could tell his Master was enjoying himself for the first time that he could remember. Death also knew the two men who were next to his Master were part of the reason. 

"Sure." All three responded. They were all smiling. Something that if anyone had ever seen them in their former lives would have made the witnesses run.

The Reapers got busy and reset it. Dumbledore was back in the middle looking around confused. "Bets?" Bets were placed and they watched the monkeys destroy Dumbledore by impaling him with a wing. "That had to hurt." The monkey wasn't happy having Dumbledore stuck on his wing and smashed Dumbledore face first into a tree. 

"Closed casket." Harry was bouncing. 

"Time frozen area?" Severus watched the reapers pick up the pieces of Dumbledore. 

"Yes. Want to do it again?" Harry looked at Severus and Sebastian. "This time we can add a flying house?"

"Yes." Severus and Sebastian agreed. 

Death didn't say anything as Harry, Severus, and Sebastian kept adding new twists to the various ways Dumbledore died by the Flying Monkeys. When it was time for the soul sorting Death had to end their fun. "Party pooper." Harry muttered as they returned to Hogwarts. Sebastian and Harry exited the Infirmary.

Dumbledore appeared confused as time began again. "The Mandrakes, Albus?" Poppy looked a bit worried about Dumbledore. "Are you alright?"

"Yes, I'm fine. I will see what I can do about the Mandrakes. I will speak to Pomona as soon as possible."

"Albus, what do you want me to do?" Molly looked at her statue children. 

"Perhaps you can keep an eye on Harry and Sebastian since Severus will be busy brewing." Dumbledore headed toward the door. 

"Oh, I will be delighted." Molly looked at her children one last time before following Dumbledore out. 

"I don't think Harry or Sebastian will be." Poppy commented to Severus. "I think I need to do a medical exam on Albus if he thinks Harry is going to be James." 

"Oh?" Severus knew Poppy wasn't fooled completely by Dumbledore but she still listened to the man. 

"Yes. Honestly trying to push those three onto Harry. We have a pool going on when Harry will start pranking the idiot. You want in?" 

"Sure." Severus was going to make sure he won.


	13. Chapter 13

The three of them escaped the annoying duo of Dumbledore and Molly after lunch. They made their way to the second-floor bathroom. Harry stopped outside of the door. "He must know the entrance is here so how about we use a Fidelius Charm?" 

"I agree and it would protect Juliet and Mary." Sebastian didn't want the sisters hurt. "Juliet would kill him as soon as she saw him. Mary would hide. She's a bit on the shy side." 

"Explains why I only saw one. Death as the secret keeper?" Harry had never thought to check the Chamber for a second Basilisk. He had avoided Hogwarts when he could because of Dumbledore in some of the other timelines. 

"Best one for the position. If Dumbledore ever managed to actually slip one of us a truth potion or use a truth spell we wouldn't be able to tell him about this. Actually, we should do it for all this information." Severus knew that Dumbledore wasn't above using potions or spells to learn what he wanted to know as he believed the ends justified the means. 

"Nothing will work on me but you are correct. We should do a Fidelius on the information. Death can do that Jedi mind trick on you to give you all the memories, again." Harry saw one of the reapers disappear. "He should be in a-"

"You need me?" Death appeared next to Harry.

"Yes, old pal of mine. We want to do a Fidelius Charm on this bathroom and one on the information about me, you, Sebastian, and the timelines." Harry knew it wouldn't be an issue. "Warn them before you return their memories." 

They entered the bathroom Death and Harry causing Myrtle to panic and flood the bathroom as she nose-dived for her toilet. "I forgot about her." Harry looked down at their soaking wet shoes and trainers. 

"Me, too." Severus knew the crazy ghost flooded the bathroom all the time. He usually avoided this part of the castle because of it.

Death snickered as he fixed everything. "I will speak to her later." 

______________________________________________________________

~Mary, come out. We have a new speaker here. Tom is back, too.~ Juliet was laying with her head in Sebastian's lap. ~They even brought someone else. He wants to make potions as Sal did." 

~Really?~ Mary peeked her head out of the stone statue. ~I have a lot of stuff saved like Sal wanted us to.~ She looked around at the group. ~They don't like that nasty old guy?~

~No, we don't. We have a death bet going. Tom, or as we call Sebastian, Severus, and I need to make some untraceable potions that we want to give the old goat.~ Harry could see that Mary and Juliet were interested in what they had planned. 

~Why can I suddenly understand the snake language?~ Severus' face showed his surprise at hearing himself hissing.

~Death.~ Harry grinned. 

~He really needs to tell us this type of stuff. Mary, Juliet, I'm a Potion Master and we want to get some revenge on the old goat.~

Mary fully emerged. ~I got a lot of stuff saved. He bound us here with just a little door to go out and feed. I miss playing with the unicorns and other animals.~

~We will remove the wards so that you can roam again. We will add a parsel invisibility spell so he can't see you either." Sebastian looked at Severus and Harry. Harry nodded his agreement. 

"Better idea." Harry grinned. "How about they get to play with us. Have them get their own revenge?" 

~Harry, we- I'm hissing, aren't I?~ Severus could see the two Basilisks and Sebastian were laughing at him. Severus remembered Harry's problem in his second year and turned away from the Basilisks. "We can't let them loose." 

"No, we can't. We can let have some fun with Dumbledore. Let him see them but no one else. We will have to find a way to block Mad-Eye's magical eye and anything else from seeing them."

"Feeling them, too." Sebastian added. "Perhaps Death might have an idea?"

"There is a very obscure potion one that I will need some rare items to make but it would do it." Severus turned and faced the two Basilisks. ~Did Salazar leave any books, materials, or even ingredients behind?~

Juliet and Mary exchanged a look. Juliet rose off of Sebastian's lap. ~Come, Sal only wanted us to show the ones worthy of it. You are worthy." Juliet guided them down the long tunnel that she originally chased Harry down. They passed the opening that leads to the bathroom. Juliet and Mary took positions on either side of a section of the wall. ~Two must speak for the first time. After you enter once, you can enter any time alone.~

Juliet and Mary used their heads and placed the three of them in front of the section. ~Say Potion Master, Lord Salazar Slytherin.~ Mary moved back into place. 

The three of them looked at the section and repeated the words. The wall slid back and they stared into a dark room, with candles slowly starting to light. Inside the room was three walls of books, four large wooden tables in a square with some space between them. There were a variety of cauldrons on the bare wall. There were potion bottles filled with ingredients and potions on the shelves below the four tables. 

~There are two smaller rooms filled with ingredients and potions.~ Juliet slithered into the room. She went to the back wall. ~Slytherin rules.~ The wall opened revealing two smaller rooms behind the wall. 

~Thank you, Juliet, Mary.~ Harry was bouncing. ~We're going to have so much fun.~

 

___________________________________________________________________

"No, Albus, I'm not going to force either of them to spend time with Molly teaching them. Harry has his muggle degree and could go to university. Sebastian has been trained by his parents before their demise." Severus looked around at Tippy. Tippy was nodding his head and grinning. Severus smirked.

Tippy summoned Juliet. Juliet looked a bit surprised as she appeared but seeing Dumbledore lunged at him. Fawkes started squawking. ~Stuff it Birdie Breath. You know he deserves it.~

Fawkes flew up into the air and pooped on Dumbledore's head as Juliet bit him. ~Nice.~ Severus watched Dumbledore fall to the ground, dead. Fawkes landed on Dumbledore and started pecking at Dumbledore's beard. 

"What is he saying?" Severus asked Tippy. 

"No idea." Tippy shooed Fawkes away. Fawkes gave a bit of a hiss. "You can join us in killing him, later." Fawkes seemed happy with that idea and flew back to his perch. "Juliet, go with Skipper." Skipper waved. Juliet slithered over to Skipper. Tippy did the reset.

"Harry needs to get some magical training." Dumbledore plucked a feather out of his beard. He looked at it and then to Fawkes. Fawkes had his head under his wing.

"Albus, you are not endearing yourself to Harry. If you keep doing this, he will not ever listen to you, no matter what you say. He needs time to adjust to all the changes. Forcing Molly on him will not be helpful."

"Severus, he is needed. We have to adjust his attitude. Molly will be a good influence. She will discipline him. She will make sure he will behave." 

"Yes, her twins, Ronald, and Ginny are excellent examples." Severus gave Dumbledore's his death glare. "I won't even mention Ms. Granger. Why you thought those two would get along I have no idea."

"What do you suggest? We have to do something. I certainly don't want him becoming friends with the children of Death Eaters." 

"You are driving him there. Leave him be. Sebastian and he are becoming friends. They study and work on potions and different theories about magic." Severus hoped the man would take the hint but knew he was going to be ignored like always. It would also give them more time to work on the potions they wanted to experiment with. 

"Severus, Tom will return." Dumbledore kept insisting on that despite the evidence contradicting those words. 

Severus pulled up his robe sleeve. "No, he isn't. He is gone. All of the marks are gone. He isn't coming back." 

Death appeared and hit Dumbledore over the head with a castiron frying pan. "Maybe that will knock some sense into him." Dumbledore slowly dropped to the floor. "Idiot." 

"That doesn't count, does it?" Severus looked down at Dumbledore.

"Nope it doesn't. It seems I'm picking up my Master's short temper regarding him." Death kicked Dumbledore. 

"It's getting addicting killing him." Severus sat back down as Death did the reset. Dumbledore looked confused and in pain. "Headache?" 

"Yes, it just hit. I need a potion and to lay down. My body is a bit sore. Poppy won't give me any more pain potions. She is afraid I will become addicted." 

Severus saw Tippy disappear and he had a feeling Dumbledore's bed was going to be very uncomfortable. "I will go and check on Harry and Sebastian."


	14. Chapter 14

Harry had glared at Molly Weasley through lunch and now it was dinner and the woman hadn't stopped talking. She had been telling Sebastian and Harry what lessons they would learn, when they were going to have them, and where. She started to tell them how they needed to write on parchment, read, write and, of course, math. 

"She needs duct tape." Harry muttered as everyone was trying to ignore Molly Weasley as she continued to lecture everyone on what Harry and Sebastian would be learning. What a great teacher she was, how she taught all her kids everything they knew. She started to go into the basic of math when Harry finally had enough, slammed down his fork. He looked at Severus. "Does she not get the fact that we know all of that?" 

"She seems to be under the impression we are idiots. I mean how could we not know how to read and write? Math was included in my lessons. How about your lessons, Harry?" Sebastian was ready to hex the old hag. He had begun to plan a few ways for her to die. He knew Severus and Harry would agree with the ideas.

"Yes, I already showed them I was done with any muggle education. Honestly, we aren't even her kids." Harry arched a brow at Severus as Severus put a hand on his arm. Severus gave a quick nod of his head toward the students who were listening. "Severus is our guardian, not you. I'm certainly not going to take lessons from a woman who is fine with me being abused." 

"Young man, you need to respect your elders." Molly rose from her seat with her wand out. Minerva had her own wand out as did most of the staff. They were used to children acting like children, not an adult acting like one if you discounted Dumbledore.

Everyone tensed up as Molly started to head toward Harry. Harry stood up. It was like the face off of the decade was going to happen. "As I told the old fart, respect is earned and neither of you has earned it back after you lost it. He left me to be abused. Your thinking that you can be my mother, telling me what to do and when to do it, isn't happening. I told the old fart I didn't want to stay with you or your family. What will take for you two to get the message? A house dropping on you?" Harry didn't mention, again. He was going to revisit the idea of a house dropping on them.

"This is exactly what I mean. You need your mouth washed out with soap. Talking to an adult like that."

"When I see an adult, I don't speak to them like that. You are acting like a child who can't get her own way so she is going to force it. Newsflash, lady, I have a guardian and you aren't it." Harry's voice was steady but those who knew magic felt it crackling in the air. The amount of magic at Harry's control was powerful and amazing to see. Those who knew magic could hear the air crackling with Harry's magic. 

Severus and Sebastian were actually impressed. They knew Harry was powerful. You didn't become the Master of Death without being able to have the power to hold the position and not have it kill you. Severus stood up. "Molly, Harry is my ward. You have no say. As I informed Albus earlier, you will not be teaching Harry or Sebastian. Harry already has his muggle A-levels, Sebastian has been tutored before his parents' demise." Severus also wasn't about to leave either of them alone with the woman. Who knew what the two of them would do to her. 

"You can't let him get away with what he just did." Molly demanded. "This is why he is so out of control. Clearly, his relatives didn't teach him any manners." 

Harry was about to speak when Severus stepped in front of him, blocking him from Molly's line of sight. Severus went to retort but Dumbledore held up his hand stopping him. "Perhaps we need to move this to my office."

Harry didn't move from where he was standing behind Severus. "Nope, not happening. I don't even want to be here in the first place. You're the reason for all of this. First, you dump me on the doorsteps of abusive relatives. Second, you ignored what I said about staying at her house. We all know where that led too. Ask the Twins. Third, you ignore what I said and brought her and the two brats with her to Hogwarts. Fourth, now you are trying to get her to teach me. I don't think so. Personally, I'm wondering what your overall game plan is. I mean come on, I am certain there a ton of orphans from the last war. Why are you so interested in me? Why do you want to be seen as training me? Why do you want to be seen as my mentor? What is up with you trying to force me to be friends with her two bratty youngest kids? Honestly, what happened there with the two youngest? You have five great older kids but you treat the youngest two as if they could do nothing wrong? Personally, I think the both of you have control issues. I mean like major control issues." Harry looked at Molly and scoffed. He turned to Severus. "I might need to have you scan us for controlling potions." 

"I'm sure he hasn't given you any potions." Severus really wanted to laugh at the look on Molly Weasley's face. Dumbledore's face wasn't much better. They weren't expecting Harry to make that statement.

"Hey Minnie, may I borrow that book I saw you reading in the staff room during your break? I promise to return it to you by the end of the week." Harry gave her his best smile. Harry had joined Severus and Sebastian in the staff lounge after Severus morning classes.

Minerva looked surprised for a second at both the name and the question. "Yes, of course. I will have one of the elves deliver it to you tomorrow." 

"Thank you, Minnie." Harry smiled and skipped out of the Great Hall.

"He knows how to make an exit." Sebastian quietly spoke to Severus. The students started gossiping.

"Severus, I want to speak to you in my office, after dinner." Dumbledore recovered enough to speak.

Sebastian and Severus exchanged a look. They knew the meeting wouldn't be going the way Dumbledore wanted it to go. "Bowling." Sebastian reminded Severus. That brought a small smile to them both. Tonight was bowling night. 

____________________________________________________________

Severus wasn't surprised to find Molly in the office with Dumbledore. He was surprised to find Minerva and Filius. After he refused the lemon drops, as usual, Dumbledore wasted no time in getting to the issue.

"Severus, we need to do something about Harry." 

"You could do what I suggested and leave him alone. He doesn't want anything to do with you or Molly. I don't blame him either."

"I am in agreement with Severus. Honestly, the two of you, bringing Miss Granger here. Molly as well as her two children. Harry made it very clear how he felt about you, Albus." 

"He was very clear about how he felt about Molly and her two youngest even before he came here. Arthur even agreed with him." Severus reminded Dumbledore. "You need to give him time. He has been through a lot of changes and you are asking him to leave the world he knows, a world that he was headed to University to, and come here and behave like a ten-year-old." 

"He needs to learn. Behaving like he did tonight." Molly was going to make that boy eat soap for a month.

"Frankly, he held a lot of restraint. You lectured all of us during lunch, no one spoke but you during our lunch period. You started lecturing us during dinner. You wouldn't shut up." Severus reminded her. "How do you expect to teach someone who is advanced beyond your own children? Math? He is doing Calculus. Reading? He had written published papers. Writing, I believe I just covered." He could see Tippy and Phil were making notes to make sure they had everything covered. "Sebastian had magical parents who taught him, also. He is studying to be a Potion Master someday as all Princes do." 

"I have to agree with Severus. Leave them alone." Filius remarked from his seat. "I have spoken to both boys. They are always polite and very knowledgeable. We have a lovely discussion this afternoon about charms and their effect in defensive magic and the theory behind using them."

"I also agree. I found them to be very polite when not being bothered by the two of you. They are very willing to learn what we can teach them. The book that Harry asked to borrow was one we had discussed during my afternoon break." Minerva had felt the magic that Harry had displayed and had a feeling if push came to shove Dumbledore and Molly would be the ones who would lose in a contest.

"Good, it's agreed. You will leave my wards alone." Severus nodded his head at Tippy, who grinned, froze time. "Since we have bowling tonight let's go with the all-time favorite of lemon drops." Severus held up the candy dish. 

Fawkes squawked as he flew to Dumbledore and pulled on the beard, wrapping it around Dumbledore's throat. Tippy stuffed lemon drops into Dumbledore's mouth while Phil was adding soap to Molly's. "She is going to be tasting soap for a long time." 

Dumbledore was gagging as he started to slide out of the chair. "I don't think that will get old." Tippy crammed another lemon drop into Dumbledore's open mouth.

"No, it won't." Death appeared. He dropped an anvil on Dumbledore's head. "It worked in the cartoons. I wanted to see how it would work on Dumbledore." 

"Everything all fixed with Harry's paperwork?" Severus tilted his head. "I don't think the cartoons were right."

"Nope, it appears not. However, I'm sure we have some ACME products we can try." Death frowned. "Maybe a bigger one, next time. However, yes, Harry's paperwork is all set. I gave him a few different articles on politics. It will make Dumbledore really wonder."

"Indeed, as well as be afraid. Bowling?"

"Yes, we even got the team shirts in for everyone. Time and Fate will be there tonight." Death waited for Phil to remove the soap bottle out of Molly's mouth. 

"She might speak in bubbles." Phil laughed as he popped away.

Death did the reset. "Severus, we must-" Dumbledore closed his eyes. 

"Another headache?" Minerva asked.

"Yes, however, that isn't the issue. Severus, Molly would be able to watch the boys while you are teaching." 

"No."

Molly tried to speak but she kept moving her tongue as if trying to clear off some unpleasant taste. "I, I," her tongue scrapped along the top of her teeth. "It would be best. They certainly can't run around Hogwarts. They are already out of control as it is."

"No. End of discussion. I have potions brewing. Stay away from them, Molly, I mean it. Albus, find out about Harry before you continue down a road you won't be able to return from." 

"I am in agreement with Severus, Albus." Minerva rose. "They aren't your wards, Molly. They are Severus'."

"I agree fully. They respect and speak very politely to everyone else. You have lost Harry's respect and I don't blame him for being resistant to your actions." The three Heads of Houses left a confused pair of idiots behind. 

__________________________________________________

Bowling that night:

Harry transformed one of the Dumbledore pins into a huge Dumbledore one. "Everyone gets a chance to destroy it. Whoever does it the best wins 50 fifty points toward the end of year prize."

"Anything goes?" Death asked. 

"Yes, anything." Harry grinned. 

Severus and Sebastian wondered what the Reapers were watching for cartoons. They saw every single method used in cartoons to destroy the Dumbledore pin including some products they had only ever seen Wiley E. Coyote used against the Road Runner. Severus decided to go with a chipper shredder and feed the pin into it turning Dumbledore into mulch. Sebastian decided to go a different route and brought in beavers. The beavers made off with the wood to use in one of their dams. Death used his sickle. He counted the rings inside to test the theory of tree rings vs just regular wood they created to determine age. He passed out the small circle disks as magnets. 

Harry's turn finally arrived. Everyone wondered what he was planning on doing. Harry first went up to the pin and dyed it pink, turning the pin into the ugliest woman they had ever seen. He tied a bow around the thinnest part of the pin. He laid the pin on the side in a glass box. He summoned a huge vat to him and using magic tipped it into the box. "Termites." The termites turned pink as they ate Dumbledore. 

Time laughed. "I believe we have our winner." 

Harry bowed. "Thank you, thank you. Now, we need to test that on the real one."


	15. Chapter 15

"Why is he smiling?" Severus wasn't sure what Harry had done but it was certainly making him happy.

"He put a pink gnome on Dumbledore's desk. It was made out of the bowling pin that the termites gnawed on." Sebastian was stirring the potion around. "I think this needs more turmeric as it seems off."

Severus walked over to where Sebastian was standing over a cauldron. Harry was on the opposite side of the room researching a potion. They were using the main potion lab to make the potions that Poppy needed. "It does but only a pinch. It's not required when it's this shade but it won't be as effective if you don't add it." 

"What is he researching anyway?" Sebastian fixed his potion. He knew he could brew but it was things like the dash of turmeric that made a Potion Master. 

"He is looking for a potion that Death mentioned that would enable us to be invisible without anyone feeling us if they were to try and touch or if we bump into them."

"That would be helpful." Sebastian knew he and Harry could create a lot of problems for Dumbledore with that type of spell. 

"Yes, it will be helpful and amusing."

___________________________________________________________________

Sebastian nudged Harry. "Dumbledore is incoming." They were sitting in the library. They working on an essay that Severus gave them to write. Yes, they knew they have just said they wrote one but Severus wanted to have evidence in case Dumbledore tried anything. 

Harry lowered his book. "Do you recognize who is with him?" Harry had thought the man would wait until Harry as here for his first year. He must be getting desperate. 

"No, should I?" Sebastian as the Dark Lord really hadn't met many of the Order people. He knew who the top people were but not always by looks. He was better with names. 

"He's Dedalus Diggle. I met him a lot during my years at Hogwarts but he never told me he was a member of the Order until my relatives were in danger. He moved them to a safe house. His own house got burned during a raid."

"Oh, I remember now. Lucius mentioned he was protecting the muggles. He learned your relatives were being protected by the Order and had them followed."

"That reminds me we need to handle Lucius."

Sebastian watched as Harry smirked at Dumbledore and Diggle when they entered the library. Tippy was standing by the door. Harry froze time again. "Restricted section." 

"Yes." 

"My boy, I want you to meet a good friend of your parents, Dedalus Diggle." Dumbledore didn't notice his frozen friend as he approached Harry and Sebastian. When he got near the Restricted section the alarm started going off. Devil's Snare appeared and snagged Dumbledore. 

"Oh, your first year." 

"What is going on, help. Someone get this plant off of me." 

Dumbledore started to struggle as the plant moved him to the center of the Restricted section. When he was in the center, Harry hit the books with a fire spell. Soon the Restriction section was on fire. The Devil's Snare dropped Dumbledore into it. Granger had burned the Devil's Snare during their first year. "Yuck, fried Dumbledore." 

"He can change the name of his Order to the Order of Fried Dumbledore." Sebastian saw Phil join them with some marshmallows. "We need to make s'mores later." 

"I can get us graham crackers and some Hersey's chocolate next time." Tippy started taking pictures. "We have a photo contest going to see who can come with the best photo from the variety of deaths." 

"Do the reset, let's find out what Dumbledore wants." Harry knew he wasn't going to be happy with whatever Dumbledore was trying to do.

Dumbledore looked a bit confused as his now smelled smoke. "Do you smell smoke, Dedalus?"

"Yes, from you. You smell like you were in a fire."

"It must be from me sitting near the fireplace this morning." Dumbledore smelled his robes. "I will change after I finish introducing you to Harry."

"Mr. Potter, it is an honor to meet you. I am so glad you are back in our world." Diggle just kept shaking Harry's hand. Harry had to pull his hand away.

"Thank you." Harry was wondering where this was going. Dumbledore didn't even introduce Sebastian. "This is my friend Sebastian Prince."

"He is one of Severus' cousins." Dumbledore basically dismissed Sebastian with a wave of his hand. "Harry, I invited Mr. Diggle here so that he may work with you on what is expected of an heir."

"What? I'm an heir. You didn't tell me that. What else have you been hiding? Honestly, I think we need to make a trip to Gringotts to find out what else you have been hiding. I'm going to find Severus." Harry didn't bother picking up the books he had been reading and left the library. 

Sebastian closed the books they had been reading. He began to separate out what they needed while Dumbledore and Diggle look stumped for an answer to what just happened. Harry leaving was not what Dumbledore had expected. 

"Albus, you didn't tell him?" Diggle was a bit surprised. "I thought he knew. Did you tell him about his family? The books talk about his life."

"He was raised by muggles. He didn't even know about our world until Mr. Dumbledore dragged him here." Sebastian picked up the pile of books he wanted. "His muggle family abused him and died in a fire. " Sebastian left the library as Diggle started to demand answers from Dumbledore. 

______________________________________________________________

"He what?" Severus was having tea with the adult version of Harry. 

"He really brought Dedalus Diggle to Hogwarts to teach me about being an heir." Harry was still trying to figure out what Dumbledore planned to accomplish with that agenda. Diggle wasn't a Lord nor an heir. The man was an old friend of Dumbledore from their Hogwarts days. Dumbledore certainly wouldn't know as he wasn't a Lord or an heir. 

"The man isn't a Lord. He has more interest in the latest rumors. I'm surprised he even left the Leaky Cauldron." Severus remembered all the Order meetings they had during the two wars. Diggle was always the one who supplied the latest rumors. Severus was the one who had to clear up the misconception Diggle gave about what the Dark Lord was actually doing. 

"The first time I met him was at the Leaky Cauldron, him and Tom made a big deal out my arrival and the crowd was surrounding me. I didn't have a clue as to why. He wouldn't stop shaking my hand and telling me how much of an honor it was to meet me. Hagrid told me about the whole Savior business." 

"You were to get a Professor, like everyone else. One who would have required you to obtain the muggle help books. Also, Hagrid isn't biased about his regard for Dumbledore." Severus was thankful that he met Harry before he started to attend Hogwarts. He would have believed Harry was like his father if he had shown up in his class unprepared.

"No, he isn't. It was strange now that I think about the events. So much was set-up by him. All designed to make me feel like I was important but I never really knew why. I was so befuddled by everything while amazed at this new world. I had believed things had changed for me for the better. All it did for me was provide me with another avenue of abuse. This one more mental than physical." Harry took a sip of his tea. "This needs a shot of something."

Severus didn't speak for several minutes. He swallowed. "When I first came to Hogwarts I thought my life was going to be so different. No more dealing with my father but I worried about my mother. I almost didn't attend. It was my mother's insistence that I do so. I know my father beat her after I left. I'm glad I did in a way but I also wonder if she would still be alive if I hadn't. He beat her during a drunken rage when I was 16."

"You want to speak to her?" Harry tilted his head. He would make sure Severus spoke to his mother if Severus desired it. "It can be arranged."

"No, I made my peace. I am not sure how she would have handled dealing the war, me being a Death Eaters, or even working here at Hogwarts. I know she would be proud of what I have done. She always told me how proud she was of my potion making skills. It was because of her that I named myself the Half-Blood Prince."

"That journal of yours got me through all the potion classes. You should write a book, fixing the mistakes, show people how the different cuts work, even how to cut." Harry wished he had all of Severus' notes during his first time at Hogwarts. During his other adventures into a Harry Potter at Hogwarts timeline he and Severus may not have gotten along due to Dumbledore but Severus didn't attack him in class.

"I have started one. Dumbledore made it abundantly clear to me that the book we are currently using for Potions is adequate." Severus had been trying for years to get the books changed. He didn't like them. They didn't cover enough for the muggle-born or even some of the half-bloods to know what was at a basic level.

"They bite." Harry had reread the books. It was surprising anyone passed Potions. People like Granger or Malfoy were the only ones who would be able to use them. Granger because of her need to be perfect, as well as her parents buying her all the books she desired as well as using the library. Malfroy because he had training from Severus beforehand. 

The door to their quarters opened and Sebastian walked in. "Dumbledore is an idiot." He sat down and Severus poured him a cup of tea. "Lovely, been looking forward to a cup of tea."

"Tell us something we don't know." 

"I heard Dumbledore speaking to Diggle. They were speaking in that classroom by McGonagall's office. Dumbledore was telling Diggle that he wanted him to teach you how the dark faction was about keeping the worlds separated. He went on a bit of a rant about making sure you knew who killed your parents. The man sounded crazier than normal."

"I wonder how Diggle would handle me converting him to the dark?" 

"It would be an interesting experiment." Severus knew Diggle was a lazy old man. He cared for little but he was one of Dumbledore's oldest friends and that was why he was part of the Order. It wouldn't take much. "He is easy to sway. Dumbledore would just offer him a lemon drop before he would give in to whatever Dumbledore wanted."

"Perhaps we should use him in another way." Sebastian smiled. "Have him report back to Dumbledore things Harry says that Dumbledore would love to hear."

"You read my mind." Harry gave them a sly smile. "I'm sure we can keep Dumbledore and Diggle busy until the school year. We need to make an appearance of going to Gringotts. I know he will have someone trying to follow us."

"He will. We can go shopping too. He will hate that you are spending money." Severus knew Dumbledore didn't want anyone but himself using the Potter vaults.

"We will need to pick up some books. Ones that Dumbledore won't want me to read." Harry wondered who would be their watcher. "Bets on who the watcher is? Winner gets an extra five minutes with the Dumbledore pins at bowling."

Tippy and Phil pulled out the betting books. "We just arrived as you mentioned the bet. Dumbledore is trying to get St. Mungos to cure the Weasleys. Their mother threw a fit. St. Mungos healers are going to see if any of the magical hospitals have the correct potions." 

"I'm sure the reapers would like the job of preventing that." 

"We are one it, Master. " Tippy handed the betting book to Phil. "Let the others know of the new bet."


	16. Chapter 16

Severus wanted to groan. They were in Diagon Alley shopping for school supplies and he could swear most of the Order was following them. They had just left the Leaky Cauldron and already he had seen Kingsley, Mad-Eye, Lupin, and Hagrid so far. They had heard Molly's mouth when they exited the Leaky Cauldron. 

They weren't even here for five minutes. Was Dumbledore really that paranoid? Was the man really that much of a control freak? Severus mentally rolled his eyes. He knew the answers. The answer was yes. He was grateful it wasn't the healthy Weasley clan shopping with them. He did like the other Weasleys. The twins were inventive. Bill and Charlie broke away from their mother as soon as they left Hogwarts. They were only at the Weasley house due to some paperwork that needed to be completed regarding a relative.

Currently, Lupin was trying to get close enough to smell Harry but not close enough for them to see him. He was failing badly. As a werewolf and they were upwind, Lupin should have been able to smell them. Severus looked at Harry who was smiling. "What did you do?" Severus arched a brow at Harry.

"Me? Nothing." Harry gave him an innocent look. Harry could see two reapers doing their jobs. They were there in case anything happened magically. They were there to prevent accidental deaths if it wasn't a person's time. 

"What did Phil or Tippy do might be a better question." Sebastian glanced over his shoulder. "Yolly is moving closer."

"Yolly? I like. Yell and Molly together, nice." Harry saw Phil and Tippy up ahead. "Phil and Tippy might have sprayed something in a certain wolf's face that might or might not be silver dust mixed with Hemlock." 

Severus stopped. "He's dead?" He felt a thrill about learning that information. 

"Not yet, he will be when we get to the steps of Gringotts. So we can see it." 

Severus smiled. "Molly?" 

"I have something special planned for her." Harry nodded at Phil as they reached the steps. Time froze. 

The trio turned and watched as Lupin started coughing and trying to figure out what was going on. Harry saw Molly was still moving and joined Lupin. Suddenly, Lupin bit Molly. She started screaming as Lupin started to transform.

"Oh, I wasn't expecting that." Sebastian watched as Lupin started to tear apart Molly as he was also trying to get rid of whatever was bothering his face. His paws were trying to swipe whatever was on his face off, each downward swipe he got Molly again. Three swipes later, Lupin had his muzzle buried Molly trying to wipe his muzzle off. Lupin finally coughed, shook, and dropped to the ground, dead. 

"Nice touch. Will she be a werewolf, now?" Severus didn't want to make the Wolfsbanes Potion for Molly or Lupin.

"I was thinking of it. What do you think it will do to Dumbledore if Molly turned into a werewolf?" 

Severus and Sebastian thought for a few seconds. "It will drive him nuts. She hates dark creatures too."

Phil and Tippy were nodding their agreement. Death appeared. "Master, if we do it, I will make sure she doesn't turn anyone." Death didn't want any unwanted deaths. He was busy enough as it was. Plus the three sisters would give Harry and him a long lecture about fate, destiny, and time. 

"Do it." Harry was almost bouncing in his excitement. Sebastian and Severus started laughing. Phil and Tippy pulled Molly away from Lupin and did the reset. 

Three happy individuals went into Gringotts. Dumbledore was going to go nuts trying to figure out who turned Molly.

________________________________________

Severus, Harry, and Sebastian made sure to hit every store and buy things that they knew weren't on their school supply list. Things that Dumbledore wouldn't want them to have knowledge of. They also gathered their forthcoming school supplies. Severus planned on telling Dumbledore he was having the boys prepare for their first year. Harry and Sebastian had a large collection of books when they went to pay for them at Flourish & Blotts. 

"I think Mad-Eye was trying to read the book titles." Sebastian took the bundle off the counter. Severus shrunk it down and he stuck it in his pocket. Severus did the same thing for all their purchases.

They went into Eeylops Owl Emporium. Harry saw Hedwig right away. He didn't waste any time buying her. He had really missed her. "I missed her so much." Harry petted Hedwig, who seemed equally happy to be reunited with Harry. Harry always bought Hedwig in any timeline he was in. Hedwig was his first friend and he never forgot her.

"I don't need an owl. May I get a cat?" Sebastian bought some owl treats for Hedwig. He had always wanted a cat. Nagini knew he did and had tried to encourage him to get one but he always denied himself the pleasure of owning one. He didn't want his Death Eaters tormenting his cat either. Nagini could defend herself very well. 

"Yes, I don't see an issue with it." Severus could see Molly was about to enter the shop. He knew she was going to claim she was buying things for that crazy owl of theirs. Molly entered the shop as Harry took the change from the clerk. They headed for the door. Molly went to open her mouth but nothing came out. "Excuse us, Molly." Severus waited for the woman to step aside for them to leave. She just stood there, her mouth opening and closing. "You might want to see Poppy about whatever is wrong." Molly tried to speak again, nothing but a sad croaking sound came out. "Molly, we need to leave, could you please move?" She still didn't move.

"And she was complaining about my manners." Harry moved around Molly and opened the door. Severus and Sebastian followed him, leaving behind a confused Molly. "I love that charm."

"Is it the ancient Russian one?" Sebastian loved old magic. 

"Yes, she won't be able to speak for the next day or so." Harry loved magic and revenge. He was glad he had spent so much time in other timelines learning what he never learned when he had first attended Hogwarts.

At Magical Menagerie they picked up a Russian Blue cat for Sebastian. Severus even ended up getting a pet. A black cat. The Russian Blue and the black cat had been in the same kennel and they didn't want to separate them. They made arrangements for a house-elf to pick up the cats as they still had more shopping to do. The two cats seemed very happy to have new owners. 

They stopped at Slug and Jiggers Apothecary, next. Mad-Eye stood outside the window watching them. Harry, Sebastian, and Severus followed the list they needed for school as well as Severus adding extra ingredients. They picked up better cauldrons to use in class, per Severus' recommendation. Severus picked up his own supplies for the potions Dumbledore would expect him to provide. He planned on owl ordering the stuff he needed for their experiments from other countries. They knew they would have to make a few more trips before the school year started for Harry and Sebastian.

Harry grinned as he saw Twilfitt and Tattings. "We need to buy clothes and robes for school."

"Yes, we do. I know I will outgrow my clothes by December. Mother used to complain about how fast I was growing." Sebastian made sure to speak loud enough for the Order members to hear him.

"Indeed. I will make sure the correct charms are added." Severus knew this was going to send Dumbledore into a fit. Dumbledore couldn't touch Harry's money, right now, but didn't mean he wasn't going to keep trying. Dumbledore knew a war was expensive. Dumbledore didn't have the funds for a war.

Harry gave a nod to Phil. Suddenly, Mad-Eye's eye started going crazy and his fake leg started walking away, leaving Mad-Eye behind. "Hmm. Should have killed him. Self-righteous fool." Sebastian never cared for Mad-Eye. 

"Don't worry. He will get his." Harry looked at his wrist. "In about three seconds."

Severus counted and as he hit three, Mad-Eye's leg came back with a bunch of fake limbs. All of them started hitting and kicking Mad-Eye. Phil passed out knives and the arms started using them on Mad-Eye. "He needs a house dropped on him."

"He will. I like that image." Harry waved his hand and they were in a wheat field. Mad-Eye was whole and healthy. Dumbledore joined him. They started running as the flying monkeys came out of nowhere. 

"Where are we?" 

"We aren't in Kansas." Harry laughed as a tornado whipped down the wheat fields and a house landed on Dumbledore and Mad-Eye. "That will never get old." He was going to have to get a pair of ruby slippers to give to Dumbledore.

"He needs ruby slippers, next." Severus had enjoyed watching the Wizard of Oz last night in his quarters. Harry was able to get the TV and DVD player to work. Severus didn't want to know how. 

"We should buy him ruby color slippers for Yule. I wonder if he would get the reference?" Sebastian watched as the wheat formed a scarecrow. "What is the scarecrow for?" 

Death appeared. He did the reset. "Master, I only have time for one more. I want to get everything done before our bowling time." 

"Good, let me make it really good." Harry summoned the Tinman and the Cowardly Lion. The trio started to chase Dumbledore and Mad-Eye. Mad-Eye and Dumbledore were trying to use magic to escape but nothing was working. The Tinman's ax took off Dumbledore's head as the Cowardly Lion ate Mad-Eye's leg. The Scarecrow was screaming about finally having a brain. 

Death did the reset and they were back in Diagon Alley. "I believe this is the first time I have ever enjoyed shopping. We will have to repeat the experience." Severus made sure to say it loud enough for Kingsley to hear. Severus wasn't known for liking to go shopping. Dumbledore would wonder what they did to make Severus like shopping.

"He was a good guy. He just believed in Dumbledore too much. It wasn't until later that he realized just how bad things were. He really does want to improve our world. Sadly, he believed Dumbledore was the answer." Harry quietly informed Severus. 

They went to the wand shop last. Technically, they didn't need new wands but knew Dumbledore would wonder why they didn't go into the shop. Ollivander hadn't changed. Yet, as soon he saw them, he paled. "Death's Master and his two apprentices." 

Harry frowned. He didn't have any apprentices. Destiny appeared. "You made it. How delightful. Garrick, get them their wands. Severus, you too." 

Ollivander didn't hesitate. He went back into his workroom. He returned with three boxes. The boxes were long sapphire boxes. He laid the three boxes on the counter. "I just finished crafting them, yesterday."

"Excellent, Garrick. Now, Severus, Sebastian, and Harry, I had these crafted for you as you will need it in this world. They are gifts from my sisters and I. Your old wands will still work, you will just have two wands now." Destiny smiled at Severus. She picked up a box. "Severus, this is yours. The wood is from a Vine Tree in my families garden." She held out the box for Severus to take the wand. "I selected the Vine Tree for you because their owners are nearly always those witches or wizards who seek a greater purpose, who have a vision beyond the ordinary and who frequently astound those who think they know them best. You will continue to surprise people, Severus." 

Severus picked the wand up. He felt the magic in the wand. "What is the core?" 

"I will answer that after I finish giving Harry and Sebastian their new wands." Destiny picked up the next box. "Sebastian." She held out the box. "The wood is Holly. It's is traditionally a symbol of luck, prosperity, and protection from evil. It’s been used in celebration rituals throughout history including the Roman festival of Saturnalia, the Pagan Winter Solstice and, of course, Christmas." 

Sebastian picked up the wand. He gave it a wave. He felt the power in the wand. Destiny smiled. "It's perfect for you. Teach the rituals we have lost." 

"I will."

"Harry, so many wands would work for you. You are the Master of Death. The Elder wand yields to you. We know the reputation associated with that wand. You will have three wands, as your Holly wand is still a great wand for you. The Elder wand power is inside you, as you know. I selected this wand crafted from Ebony Wood. This jet-black wand has an impressive appearance and reputation, being highly suited to all manner of combative magic and to Transfiguration. I know you will use it well." 

Harry took the wand. He felt the power. He looked at Destiny, smirked. "Really?" 

"Yes, dear. Really. Inside each of your wands is a tail feather from a Thunderbird. It's powerful but difficult to master, particularly prized by Transfigurers. It will sense danger and cast curses on their own. You three will have no problem mastering them. Garrick knows Dumbledore will ask what you received for wands. He will say the correct wood but inside will be Dragonheart String."

"I can see if Death will handle his memory. Dumbledore might decide to pry." Harry didn't think Ollivander would disobey Destiny but he knew Dumbledore. Dumbledore liked to control everything in Harry's life. Dumbledore actually liked to control the magical world.

"He has tried before but it has always failed. Your secrets safe with me." Ollivander smiled. "Though I wouldn't mind joining your bowling league." 

Destiny laughed. "I will make sure you are on my team." 

"Excellent. I look forward to tonight."

Harry looked closely at Ollivander. He looked at Destiny. "He's-"

"Yes, he is. Now, shoo. I want to spend time with my husband, Hephaestus." Destiny waved her hand. "The Order members will believe they were successful in following you."

"Thanks, D. I appreciate it." Harry kissed Destiny on the cheek. "Don't forget it's your turn to bring the snacks."

"Fried Dumbledore?" Destiny suggested.

The trio left the store with smiles on their faces. They headed back to the Leaky Cauldron to floo to The Three Broomsticks. They could have apparated but Harry and Sebastian, technically, weren't allowed to.


	17. Chapter 17

They had just finished putting away their books when Dumbledore knocked on Severus' door. Severus put down his own cat who he had been petting. Sebastian's had been following Sebastian as he put his books in the bookcase. Harry sighed. "That was fast. I wasn't expecting him until after dinner."

"When will Molly realize she is a werewolf?" Severus wondered if Dumbledore was aware of the newest werewolf. It could be why Dumbledore was already at his quarters.

"Not until the next full moon. Death will make sure she doesn't turn anyone. So it's not that. Wands?" 

"It would be to fast for that. He wouldn't even have gotten a full report, I would think." Sebastian glanced at the clock. "We have only been back for about fifteen minutes." 

They heard a knock on the door, again. Dumbledore wasn't going to go away. Severus got up. "I will say we were in my lab. It has to be the books."

"Agreed." Harry and Sebastian answered together.

Severus opened the door. Dumbledore was about to knock on the door again. "We were in my lab putting away the supplies we just purchased." 

"Yes, I'm aware of your shopping trip. I am a bit concerned." Dumbledore walked into Severus' quarters as if he was his own quarters. "I am very concerned about the books that were purchased by Harry." 

Harry went to open his mouth but Severus beat him to it. "The books are not up for debate. I am his guardian and you know I would never allow him to read any book that is dangerous." Severus knew Harry would have told Dumbledore to stuff his concerns. Severus wanted to tell Dumbledore that information but he also wanted to keep his job for now.

"Severus, we need to discuss this." Dumbledore looked at Harry and Sebastian who listening to the discussion. "Perhaps we should speak about this in private."

Harry went to speak again but Sebastian tugged him over to the fireplace. Harry glared at Dumbledore. Severus moved to stand between Harry and Dumbledore. He had a feeling Dumbledore might just meet Death a lot sooner if he didn't rein in Dumbledore. "Albus, I approved each and every book that they selected. It's my decision. Do try to remember that I am their guardian. They aren't even students here at present. They have another ten months before they become one. I am not going to allow them to pick up lazy study habits."

Death appeared behind Dumbledore. He stuck some TNT in Dumbledore's robe pockets. He lit the fuse. "What a maroon." Death began to do the three-second countdown. Death added a shield around Dumbledore just before he exploded. "Well, it doesn't match the cartoons." Death knew this death didn't count either. Death had been annoyed by Dumbledore. 

"I would say not." Harry walked over to the mess created by Dumbledore. "Can't we just leave him dead?"

"No, sadly, he is still needed in this timeline." Death sighed. "It would make it easier if we could just keep him from being born." 

"It would but it really take away our fun." Harry smiled. He looked at the clock. "I was going to suggest we visit a shooting range. However, dinner is going to start soon and we have bowling after that."

"True. Reset?" Severus watched Harry move to the fireplace. He really didn't want to listen to a lecture from Dumbledore but he knew they were going to come regarding every decision he would make.

Death deeply sighed. "I have a feeling we will need more time to vent tonight."

Severus nodded his agreement as Death did the reset and disappeared. Dumbledore moved a bit as he registered some pain. Severus arched a brow, waiting for Dumbledore to continue speaking. "Severus, privately, please." 

Severus wanted to kill Dumbledore but gave in. He realized it would be the only way that Dumbledore would leave. "Boys, go to your room while I speak to the Headmaster."

Harry sent Dumbledore a look that could kill while wishing looks could kill. Once the door to the second bedroom closed Severus didn't wait for Dumbledore to speak. "Albus, no more of this. You are not Harry's guardian. You can't control him and what he learns. All you are doing is ruining any chances of him ever trusting you. Why don't you just leave him alone?" 

Dumbledore looked a bit surprised by Severus' actions. "Severus, he is vital for the war effort. I can't tell you why but he is vital. You were there and heard only part of the prophecy. We need to protect him as well as keeping him safe."

"For someone who wants all that you are certainly not making sure of any of that. In case you haven't noticed, the boy hates you. How do you think this attitude you are channeling is helpful? How do you think having Molly here is helping? How about her kids? Granger? You are creating issues that won't be resolved later for whatever you believe is going to happen." Dumbledore went to speak to defend his actions. "No, Albus. You need to think of it from his position. He never even heard of you until the day you showed up as his relatives died. You didn't even speak to him before making decisions regarding his life." Severus inhaled deeply. "When you actually hear the words I am speaking? When it's too late? When it's beyond mending any attempt at even a civil discussion?"

Dumbledore opened and closed his mouth, doing a good imitation of a fish. "We need Harry. However, I will work on worrying about other things instead of Harry. I do want to be kept abreast of any developments regarding Harry. I do understand what you are saying. I am afraid I am a bit concerned regarding his attitude. I will refrain from forcing my opinions and concerns on Harry." 

"I will keep you informed if you keep Molly and the rest away from Harry. I will not be held responsible for his attitude toward them. He doesn't want anything to do with them." Severus was going to enjoy watching Dumbledore try to work about the new guidelines. He was going to have to speak to the reapers about setting a bet for when Dumbledore broke this agreement. As if they knew what he was thinking Phil and Tippy appeared. The betting book was in Tippy's hand. 

Dumbledore appeared to be thinking of about the terms of this agreement. "I find it acceptable." 

Severus really wanted to tell the man he really didn't care if he found it acceptable or not. "That includes letting me be his guardian. No deciding what he shall and shall not read, do, or even how he acts. It is my job. I mean it, Albus. He is my responsibility." 

"I do understand." Dumbledore looked a bit insulted by Severus' words. 

Phil pulled out one ACME's Blackholes. He threw it on the floor. He got behind Dumbledore and went "beep, beep." Dumbledore jumped a bit and fell into the blackhole. 

"Nice." Tippy looked down. "Where did he go?" 

"Not sure." Phil looked at the hole. "It doesn't say on the directions." Phil pulled out the instructions. "I hope we don't have to go looking for him." He began rereading the directions.

"We do need him back in time for dinner. I don't believe Death or even the three sisters would like it if we lost Dumbledore." Severus knew Harry wouldn't care. Death most likely did since it would affect the timeline. "Perhaps, if we pick it up he might reappear?"

Harry opened the door. He looked out. He didn't see Dumbledore so he walk to where Severus, Phil, and Tippy were standing. "Oh, a blackhole. Is Dumbledore missing?"

"We aren't really sure." Phil was still reading the directions. "It doesn't say what happens to the person or where they are." 

"Interesting." Harry looked down into the hole. "It might a good thing to keep around for when we do the soul-sorting."

"We still need him." Severus reminded the trio. 

Sebastian came out of the room. "I missed Dumbledore dying? Why didn't anyone call me?" 

"It was a spur of a moment thing. Phil got a bit carried away." Tippy looked at Phil who was flipping the directions around. "No luck?"

"No." Phil handed Tippy the directions. "Nothing but how to use it." 

Harry walked to Severus' desk. He picked up a box that he had put on the desk before Dumbledore arrived. The box had originally held his new quill tips. He transformed the box into stone. He dropped it into the hole. "I think we lost Dumbledore." 

"This is so coming out of my wages." Phil huffed. "My wife is going to kill me."

"So will the boss." Tippy folded the directions. "So what are we going to do?"

Harry did a little dance. "Hopefully, we can leave him there." 

"Harry, that isn't a solution. You know we need him." Severus tried to give Harry his stern look but seeing how happy Harry was he knew it wasn't the full force of his glare.

"He is right." Sebastian looked into the hole. "Perhaps one of the sisters might be able to help."

Death appeared. He saw them looking into a blackhole on the floor. "What happened?" 

Everyone pointed to Phil as they said: "he did it." 

"Thanks for backing me up." Phil rolled his head. 

"Give him the directions. He might know what happened." Harry hoped Death did. It would save him a lot of time and paperwork.

"Dumbledore?" Death took the direction. "ACME. It figures. They never provide the solutions. I have been looking at their directions for some of the products I ordered." Death had some he still hadn't figured out how they worked. He had been watching the cartoons for ideas.

"Any idea?" Harry really didn't care if they recovered Dumbledore or not. However, he did understand the effects it would have on this timeline. "Not that I really care if he disappears forever but I hate paperwork."

Death stood up. "No. I believe we will need the assistance of Time. She should be able to do a reset."

"That is going to cost us." Harry muttered. "She hates when we do this type of stuff."

"You have lost people before?" Severus wasn't sure if he wanted an answer or not.

"Sure. It happens a lot actually. However, not with any ACME products." Death looked at Harry. "Anything we can use to bribe her with?"

Harry began to review his stash of supplies he used on the three sisters. "Chocolate won't do it. It is going to have to be big. She might bring in her sisters." 

"True. Perhaps allowing her to delay a death or even arrange an early one?" Death suggested. "If she brings in her sisters, we can always try doing a holiday offer."

"Start out low. She will bargain." Harry looked into the hole. "I would love to know where it goes." Harry looked at the edges. It really does look like a real hole. The hole looked like it always been in Severus' living area.

The five of them looked down into the hole. "Most likely somewhere we don't want to be." Tippy looked at his boss. "We will have to redo some time adjustments too." 

"I will add that into the bargain. She might be in a good mood since she got to spend time with her husband. I will see what I can do. Hopefully, we can discover a solution."


	18. Chapter 18

Time appeared next to Severus and Harry. She was dressed in a long flowing white gauze gown which made her black hair shine. She looked down into the hole. "So they work, interesting." She had a small smile on her face. 

Everyone looked at Time. "You know about them?" Tippy looked shocked at Time knowing about blackholes. Harry was accessing Time trying to figure out what it was going to cost for her to fix this mess. He should have made the deal himself. 

"Yes, I love watching Looney Toons." Time looked at Harry. "You owe me a holiday. I'm going to spend it with hubby." She leaned a bit forward. "It really doesn't go anywhere. It's like a time sink. They just disappear into it and have no knowledge of time passing." 

"I do? He won't?" Harry was a bit confused. Death appeared and looked depressed. Harry knew Time got more than a holiday as he looked at Death.

"Yes, if I fixed this, you owe me a holiday. Death will serve as time while you do his duties." Time gave them a beaming smile. "Just think of all the fun you could have."

"Why do I have a feeling I'm going to regret asking this but what else are we expected to do for this favor?" Harry arched a brow at Death who just shrugged at him. 

"Well, let's just say for the next month you will allow me to play with Dumbledore too." Time was looking forward to playing with Dumbledore. He had given her and her sisters a lot of headaches.

Harry arched a brow. "Why do I have a bad feeling about that?" He knew Time was hiding something.

"She wants to have her own personal visits with Dumbledore. She will use a time frozen zones, however, we will be aware of it." Death didn't want to agree to her terms but they really needed to get Dumbledore back.

"No, you aren't going to interrupt with me being able to kill Dumbledore. I waited for a long time to do this." Harry was aware he sounded like a little kid who was throwing a temper tantrum because his favorite toy was being taken away. "Do you know how many times I have wanted to torment the man?"

Severus and Sebastian noticed all the reapers backed up a bit. Severus stepped back and pulled Sebastian with him. Sebastian didn't even look at Severus. He was watching Harry and Time. "You could always fix this yourself." Time wore a smug smile.

"I will ask Fate or Destiny. Since you watched Looney Toons I know they have too." Harry returned the smug smile. He knew he had her. He also knew if he asked Fate, she would bargain but it would be a steeper price.

Time and Harry stared at each other. Death took a step back as they kept staring at each other. The rest of the group took their hint from Death and moved even further away. Severus wondered who was going to give. He knew Harry was stubborn he wasn't sure about Time. However, he figured she had to just as stubborn after all she was Time. 

After about fifteen minutes of silence, Time slouched in defeat as made a face. "Fine, I won't interrupt your fun. I just want to be considered when you plan something besides bowling. I still want my holiday."

"How long?" 

"A month." 

"No, a week." Harry countered.

"Three weeks. Why did you have Death bargain with me if you are going to change the terms?" Time preferred to bargain with Death. He hated to bargain. Harry, however, was a different story.

"I was hoping you would do it because it's Dumbledore. We have the bowling league. You can join us anytime I decide to kill the man. Two weeks holiday. You know Death and I will have a field day playing with time if we get bored while your away." 

Time chewed her lip for a second. "Deal." Everyone moved back to the blackhole. "Death, I need the ACME catalog." 

"I will have Phil deliver it to you." Death pointed to the hole. "We need him."

Harry growled a bit but didn't say anything. Time bent down and picked the blackhole up and shook it. Dumbledore fell out of it and landed in a heap on the floor. Harry just shook his head. "I can't believe we didn't think of that." 

"I will reset time now." Time watched Harry and Sebastian leave the room as Severus moved to stand in front of Dumbledore who was attempting to get up and wondering what was going on. Everyone ignored the man wondering what was going on. Time snapped her fingers.

"What's wrong, Albus?" 

"I'm a bit sore. I believe I need to visit Poppy. In regards to Harry, I will speak to Molly. I hope someday to be able to have a pleasant conversation with Harry." The reapers started laughing as Death pulled out an anvil and dropped it on Dumbledore's head. 

"That had to hurt." Severus wondered if he even made a headache potion strong enough to handle Dumbledore's ongoing pain issues.

"I know it won't increase his brain power but he does say the stupidest of things at times." Death watched the reapers arrange the reset. 

"If you need any potions do let me know. I can use the time to give the boys a potion lesson." 

"Yes, yes, very good my boy." Dumbledore touched his head. "If you need me, I'll be up in the infirmary."

Severus escorted Dumbledore to the door. As soon as Dumbledore left, Harry and Sebastian exited the bedroom. "I can't wait to give him more headaches." 

Harry and Sebastian laughed. 

____________________________

The next few days passed fast as Dumbledore actually held up his end of the deal and Harry and Sebastian didn't see Dumbledore, Molly, or her kids. They had also remained in Severus' quarters while Severus taught. They had their bowling nights and now it was Friday. Severus entered his quarters to find Harry and Sebastian sorting through ACME product packages. 

"Do I want to know?" Severus 

"Death delivered the products we ordered. Did you know ACME products don't exist in this world? Death had to go to some universe where Looney Toons characters are worshipped." Harry held up a small package. "This opens up to a giant Jack-in-the-Box that will hit the person over the head with a sledgehammer." 

"Indeed." 

Sebastian held up their own supply of ACME bombs and dynamite. "Death said the bombs worked great." Severus listened to them as they produced all the stuff that Death got from them. Severus made a mental note of which items he wanted to try out.

"Oh, that looks interesting." A female voice spoke from the left of them. When the three males looked at her, she waved. "Hello." 

Harry jumped up from the floor and hugged the woman. "Karma, why didn't you tell me you were coming?"

"I didn't know you were here. I heard Death and Fate talking about some ACME Products and where to get them. I provided some information and I asked Death where you were. He told me here and I just had to come and see who got my sisters to actually not fight." Karma was a petite thing. She wore a black pair of jeans with a long camel cardigan with a white tee. She had a pair of long black riding boots on.

"Did he tell you what we have been doing?" Karma pointed at Severus and Sebastian. "Oh, sorry. I just was excited to see you."

"I noticed." Karma smiled. "Hello, I'm Karma. I'm the youngest sister of Fate, Time, Destiny, and Death."

"Severus Snape and Sebastian Prince." Harry introduced them.

"Death is your brother?" Sebastian was a bit surprised.

"Yes, it's why he can never win an argument or make a deal. He's older than me but younger than them. They know how to get their way with our brother."

Sebastian looked at Harry. "You had Fate, Destiny, Time, and Karma on your side this whole time?'

"Well, I didn't know Karma would be around. She is usually off playing with people who think they have it made while being jerks. There is a reason for that expression. She can be one when people really get her mad."

"He is being polite. I also love to play with Fate's favorites. So who are you tormenting?" 

"Dumbledore." All of them answered.

"Oh, I have been wanting to get even with him. Please, may I help?" Karma gave a bit of a sad face. "Please, please, you know how much I hate the man." She gave Harry pleading look.

Harry started laughing. "I know. We have spent many nights getting drunk because of him." Harry turned to Severus. "She can really drink, too. I made the mistake of thinking I could outdrink her. I mistook her size." 

Karma laughed. "Looks are very deceiving. So is that a yes?"

"Yes, it is. Did they tell you about bowling?" Harry was almost bouncing in his excitement. 

"No, they didn't. So fill me in. Why are you here? Why is Tom Riddle now Sebastian Prince? How did you get Severus to actually join you at this age?" 

Severus and Sebastian exchanged a look. "Come, we have a lot to tell you. Have you ever seen the movie The Wizard of Oz?" 

"Yes." Karma wondered what the movie had to do with Dumbledore. 

"Great, you can help us with the flying monkeys as well as the house."

"Well, this sounds really interesting. Have you thought about using the poppy field?" 

Sebastian laughed. "I like the way you think."


	19. Chapter 19

Karma spent the night in Harry and Sebastian's room while they slept on the transfigured couch and chair. Severus was a bit surprised when Karma came out of the bedroom looking like a ten-year-old girl from the Prince family. "So do I pass as a Prince?" Karma did a quick twirl, showing off the latest in children's robe fashions. She was wearing a simple lavender robe with some deep purple roses embroidered into the fabric. She had the Prince almost black hair and eyes, she was a bit tall for her age, fitting the Prince family genes.

"Yes. You aren't staying for long? Dumbledore will wonder why I'm suddenly getting custody of so many kids." Severus suddenly wondered why Dumbledore hadn't questioned him regarding his custody of Sebastian. Normally, the man would have summoned up to his office and asked 1001 questions. 

"No, I figure you can just say I'm staying for a few days. I just want to kill him a few times. My sisters and brother have been telling me about how much fun killing Dumbledore is." Karma smiled. "So who can I pretend to be?" 

"I have a lot of female cousins, just pick a name that starts with an S and it will work." Severus never discussed his family so he wasn't worried about the sudden insurgences of his family at Hogwarts. Granted two weren't a lot but for him it was.

"Go with Septima." Harry suggested. He knew it would drive Dumbledore crazy having another pure-blood around him that wasn't a Weasley.

"It would fit." Sebastian 

Severus was a bit impressed. Many people didn't know Roman names unless they were pure-bloods. "It would fit." Severus agreed as he watched Harry and Sebastian head into their room to get ready for the morning. He headed to the kitchenette to make coffee, Karma followed. Severus turned on the water to fill the coffee maker.

Karma watched Severus for a few seconds. Testing time. "You know, he's not really a child." Karma was a bit protective of Harry and she knew it.

"What?" Severus was a bit confused and almost dropped the can of coffee. He had been thinking of an adult Harry several times. 

"You are having fun with them but you see Harry as a child. He isn't. He's been an adult for a long time." Karma smiled she saw the slight hint of red creep into Severus' face. "I see." So her sisters and Death were correct. She hadn't been sure but she wanted to make sure. She knew her sisters weren't the best when it came to human interactions. They were usually blinded by their own desires versus what was best for Harry at times. It was why she had attempted to interfere so many times when Harry was originally growing up. 

Severus coughed. "I believe we discussed enough of that issue."

"What issue?" Sebastian was still in his pajamas and robe. 

"Nothing to concern yourself with." Severus wasn't about to have the discussion with the Dark Lord no matter how much the man had changed. 

"May we add another bathroom? One just isn't going to work for the three of us, especially when we start our first year." He also wanted a tub. He would make sure Harry added one. He didn't believe Harry would say no. Harry's main focus has been making Dumbledore as uncomfortable as possible while ruining the man's reputation and killing him as many times in a day as possible.

"Harry didn't do one already?" Severus was thankful Sebastian entered the room. He wasn't sure what Karma's next question would be. It seemed the sisters had no problem making him as uncomfortable as possible. 

"He was but I wanted to make sure it wasn't something Dumbledore might notice and question you about." Sebastian was looking at Karma and Severus. He wondered what he missed. 

"He would notice but I will just tell him the elves did it. I'm sure Death or Harry can talk the elves into agreeing." 

Annie popped into the room. "Death wanted me to warn you that Dumbledore is going to have a Child Protective Services inspection for you. He is hoping to talk them into giving custody of Harry and Sebastian to him. He claims you are abusing the boys." 

Severus groaned, Sebastian cursed a bit under his breath as he stormed out of the kitchenette to warn Harry. Harry and Sebastian appeared freshly dressed and with wet hair before Severus had time to move.

"I popped us to another universe to clean up. I spoke with Death, he changed the person who is going to do the interviews. He didn't say who. Dumbledore had one of his old cronies' wives ready to do it but she has been detained by an emergency with one of her grandchildren. Nothing major but Death made it the message sound worse." Harry looked at Annie. "Nice to see you, Annie, been busy?"

"Yes, the Winchesters have been busy so that means I've been busy. I switched places with Tippy today. I needed a break." Annie knew a lot of the reapers, especially Billie wanted to reap the Winchesters. 

Severus handed everyone coffee and was about to take a sip when they heard the knock at their door. Dumbledore always had lousy timing. 

"Are we sure we can't just kill him and leave him dead?" Sebastian looked at Harry hopefully. 

"Sorry, I wish but we can't. I didn't even get to drink my coffee." Harry knew they couldn't be seen with coffee as Dumbledore might use it against Severus so he banished their coffee as Severus gave him a glare daring him to take his coffee. "You can be seen drinking it, we can't. Dumbledore would push you aren't watching what we are eating." 

They heard another knock and headed to the living area. Karma sat down on the couch as Harry and Sebastian took the two chairs by the fireplace. Leaving only Severus' favorite chair for anyone to sit down. Severus never encouraged people to visit him and kept his living area to the barest possible seating. There was a small couch as well as two other chairs along with his favorite chair. It was the standard furniture that came with the quarters. His desk was almost in the middle of the room with bookcases along the walls. 

Severus opened the door, using his hand to cover a fake yawn. "Albus?" 

"Ah, Severus, good morning. Mr. Whitaker is here to check on Harry and Sebastian." Dumbledore gave a slight smile. 

"Yes, I'm from Child Protective Services. There has been a complaint filed against you concerning the boys and abuse. May I do an inspection?" Mr. Whittaker was standing a bit behind Dumbledore. 

"Certainly, we just were getting ready to head to the Great Hall for breakfast." Severus stepped aside to grant access to his quarters. Mr. Whitaker looked a lot like Death dressed in wizarding robes with dirty blond hair. Death winked at Severus as he entered Severus' quarters. Severus looked at Harry who was attempting to cover a grin. He should have known Death would have a solution to this problem when Annie appeared to inform them. Severus waited until Dumbledore was in the room before closing the door. "So I've been accused of abusing Harry and Sebastian? Who accused me?" 

"Now, my boy, that isn't important. What is important is that Harry and Sebastian are safe and protected." Dumbledore smiled at Harry who was glaring at him.

"Mr. Dumbledore and Molly Weasley have accused you." Death was going to enjoy this. "They claim you are making them work long hours in the potion labs and that you aren't educating them in everything they should be taught before starting Hogwarts as well an attitude issue." Death looked at Harry. 

"What? After he left me to be abused by my muggle relatives. After he tries to pawn me off on Molly Weasley, who is verbally abusive. Are you serious?" Harry looked at Dumbledore. "Have you been eating lead paint? Inhaling Asbestos? Smoking something you shouldn't? Inhaling glue? You were the one who neglected me and left me to be abused. I am finally in a place where I'm not being abused and you call CPS on Severus. Someone should be investigating you. Is there any way I can file charges against him? Restraining Order, perhaps?"

"Now, my boy, I'm only doing what I think is for the best." Dumbledore's eyes were twinkling. He faced Death. "As you can see, the boy needs a firm hand. He needs to have someone who will guide him in the social correct behavior." 

"No, what I do see is a man who is trying to regain control over someone famous and is using Mr. Prince as an added bonus. I did do my own research before we came here, Mr. Dumbledore." Death moved aside into the direct line of sight of Harry and Karma. Sebastian was looking at Dumbledore as if envisioning the man dead already. "As for filing charges, I will speak to Madam Bones, she is the head of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement. I will also be investigating the muggles you resided with if you can provide me with their names and address."

"They died in a fire. It's why I'm here now. He left me on the doorsteps of their house the night my parents were killed." Harry glared at Dumbledore. "He and Molly Weasley have been trying to get me to spent time with the youngest Weasleys. However, they are dangerous kids. Since I've been here they have in the infirmary for one thing or another. They are there now with a muggle-born by the name of Granger. They aren't even eleven, either."

"He did? Mr. Dumbledore, did you leave a toddler on the doorsteps of his muggle relatives?"

Before Dumbledore could respond, Harry waved his hand and a huge anvil landed on him. "Still not like the cartoons. We need to start using Batman and having sound effects." 

Death looked at the mess. "I agree. As well as some protective stuff to keep the blood off of the clothes." Death cleaned everything as the reapers did a reset. 

"It was a difficult time. I did what needed to be done." Dumbledore didn't like how this was going. 

"You do realize at 13 months a lot of babies are able to walk? He could have walked off and who knows what could have happened." Death arched a brow as he finally noticed Karma sitting on the couch. "I'm sorry, you didn't mention that Mr. Snape has a daughter." 

"I don't. She is another cousin, Scilla Prince. She arrived last night to spend a few days while her parents are visiting other relatives." Severus watched Dumbledore as Dumbledore tried to figure out why he was suddenly in pain. "She might attend Hogwarts in September."

"Now regarding the Weasleys and this Granger girl, I will be speaking to the head of the infirmary. I will discover what happened to them." Death turned his attention to Dumbledore. "I am going to head to the infirmary and speak to Madam Pomfrey about the boys and those in the infirmary." 

Dumbledore opened his mouth and closed it. He wasn't expecting the tables to be turned on him. "Poppy has everything under control. It was just an accident."

"Unsupervised flying got them hurt the first time. Molly Weasley was too busy trying to make me into what she wanted me to be to watch her youngest children. You aren't even sure how they got turned into stone." Harry helpfully added. 

"So they are stone?" Death was enjoying this.

"No, they are just petrified." Dumbledore reassured Death. "It's being handled. St. Mungo's is already aware of the situation." 

"I will speak to them also. Show me the way, Mr. Dumbledore." Death walked to the door. "Mr. Snape, I will speak to you when you and the boys after this."

Harry stood up and froze time as Nagini lunged at Dumbledore. Her fangs sinking into Dumbledore's neck. She released him and bit down on the man's body. One fang hitting his shoulder while the other pierced the stomach. "Snake food, I wish I had thought of it." Sebastian patted Nagini when she released Dumbledore.

Death did a reset. Nagini backed away, hissing about how bad Dumbledore tasted. ~Not lemony like I expected.~

"Mr. Dumbledore, are you ready? You seemed to have disappeared into thought for several minutes. Do you have issues with your memory?" 

"No, no, I don't. I just feel a bit under the weather. Perhaps, we should go and see Poppy." Dumbledore didn't waste any time leaving the room. 

Harry started laughing.


End file.
